computer

a giant box filled with electrical pathways and boards to release secret airborne chemicals to make us addicted to the computer frequency thus causing high electrical bills

wow. look at 10 computers! wow! look at my bill! 45 grand!

by gusto5 April 8, 2004

computer procrastination

the art of ignoring all your pressing and important tasks while playing computer games.

i had three assignments to do in the weekend but i filled up my time with computer procrastination.

by TrIaNgLiSt BoB May 1, 2006

Computard

A computer user who's hella retarded and hasn't any idea what the hell they're doing with a computer. Someone who thinks a virus scanner will protect them from pop-ups and banner ads. Someone who deserves nothing more than a limited-rights account and no ability to install software themselves. If they need Flash or Acrobat Reader, they need to call IT instead of bothering downloading themselves. Viruses and trojans were written because these people deserve them.

Thea is such a computard; she spilled coffee in her laptop and screwed up the MBR on the desktop I let her use — she's such a roob!

by Joshwalla May 23, 2009

Computer Hangover

A computer hangover is the feeling you get when you've been on the computer or texting or watching a movie or playing video games all day. Depending on the person, it can also occur after a few hours or even thirty minutes. Computer hangovers almost never occur when accompanied by another person, either because of the desire to impress them or because you were engaged in another activity (e.g. talking, thinking, or...) instead of just spacing. The effects of a computer hangover can be achieved as well by spacing for a day, lying on the couch for five hours, but lets see you try that.

SYMPTOMS:
-- headaches
-- slight naseau (depending on the person)
-- dry taste in mouth
-- extreme dislike of sunlight
-- sudden attraction to couch
-- loss of will to do anything other than just lie there
-- hunger or thirst (seeing as to you haven't probably left the couch for a few hours)
-- loss of memory for most of that day
-- empty sleepiness

CURES:
-- a cool shower
-- a glass of cold water
-- more computer (WARNING: temporary! Your computer hangover will get worse afterwards.)
-- time, time time!
-- calling a friend to chat
-- reengaging your mind with something required like homework (WARNING: no media should be involved, or your computer hangover will not be helped at all!)
-- Going outside for a quick run/walk
-- Washing your face with a cold cloth
-- Changing your clothes, brushing your hair, doing new makeup, "freshening up"

A: Dang, I've got one sick comp hangover. geez, this sucks. Can you grab me some water?
B: Sure. Dude, you have such a Computer Hangover. (Brings A a glass of water). So, how 'bout that homework?
A: WHAT?
B: I told you earlier, you have homework.
A: Nooo! I can't think at all right now.
B: You really don't remember?
A: Nothing. Nilch. Nada.

by InsanityisSexy:) June 12, 2011

computering

(v)Completing a task that requires knowledge and understanding of a computer. Can be associated with software or hardware.

Tracy was hired despite her poor verbal and computering skills.

by TMMI July 12, 2008

computer widow

Term used to refer to the spouse of a vidiot.

Computer Widow: Honey, stop playing WOW and cuddle with me.
Vidiot: Awww, come on. Just until I reach level 60.

by Katie-Ivan April 23, 2006

computer crackhead

A computer crack head is a person that spends an insane amount of time using the computer, being mentally seperated from the outside world.

People who play retarted online games for long periods of time.

Angela: Nick you've been on the computer for 8 hours straight. Go brush your teeth, and take a shower!

Nick: I'm not finished yet! I have to kill this dragon, and collect fairy dust.

Angela: Nick, your a computer crackhead.

by Cewt Pickle for a Nickle July 22, 2009