Better out than intimate

To break wind whilst being intimate with someone. The release of said gas is often associated with the other participant(s) in the sexual act discontinuing their participation.

''Well, looks like I'm on the hunt for a new girlfriend again. Susie and I were really connecting spiritually and emotionally during an extended Alabama lane change, but a better out than intimate squeezed its way out of my anüs as I was going for it and the gas has caused her to suffocate and die. If I'm being brutally honest, the initial chloroform might have been a culprit in the suffocation too.''

Better out than intimate by Anonymous submissions August 7, 2018

Better Nate Than Never

A phrase used to express the exellence of being in the presence of Nate, as oppossed to not being in the presence of Nate at all.

Teacher:"Nathan, You were late to class today."

Nathan:"Well,teacher! I say to you,Better Nate Than Never!"

Better Nate Than Never by spartansean15 May 2, 2006

Better qualified than Donald Trump

A vague term that can refer to just about any person, animal or inanimate object that is better qualified to be President of the United States than failed Republican re-run Donald Trump. For some reason the GOP is hanging their hopes and dreams on the doomed presidential bid of a convicted rapist and felon who is so broke he's resorted to selling national secrets to the Chinese and doing personal favors for Vladmir Putin in exchange for campaign donations.

This snowglobe depicting the Toronto skyline and CNN Tower in a blizzard is better qualified than Donald Trump to be President because, unlike Trump, it sits harmlessly on a desk without committing rape or sedition.

This egg-salad sandwich I bought from a truck stop is better qualified than Donald Trump to be President because, unlike Trump, people will discard it when it starts to stink.

This strip of gauze with pubes stuck to it is better qualified than Donald Trump to be President because the only person it affected was the sex worker whose eyes watered when it was ripped out of her crotch during a Brazilian wax, unlike Trump who put pretty much everybody in danger when he stole documents naming undercover CIA operatives in foreign countries and sold them to Iran.

This "I ❤️ Pounding Proud Boy Ass" T-shirt is better qualified than Donald Trump to be President because it's less offensive and more fun at parties, has a better understanding of world politics and U.S. history and Constitutional law, and plus it won't try to give a long, pointless speech about how it really didn't lose the election if the Georgia governor had only committed fraud to find some "extra" Trump votes, and if it weren't for the hordes of drag-queen immigrants, by now somebody would have found evidence of the kind of voter fraud that wasn't intended to benefit Trump.

Better qualified than Donald Trump by doubleghost March 28, 2024

better red than dead

Play on words of "better dead than red", which means you'd rather die than be a communist.

Better red than dead implies that capitalism has gotten so bad and companies so greedy that you'd rather be communist (as there is ideally a minimum guaranteed food ration provided from the state for free) because otherwise you'll die from not being able to afford the highly inflated price of goods necessary for human life, such as food and water.

Hardcore American: What the fuck? You think we should just give food away for free and that healthcare should also be free? Better dead than red, you commie bastard.

Average American wage slave in 2050: *sigh* I have two jobs and work 100 hours a week and never get to spend time with my family and yet I still can barely afford to feed myself and my kids... Better red than dead, maybe those commies were onto something...

better red than dead by СукаБлять March 18, 2025

still a better love story than twilight

When connections between two objects, an individual or an object, or even two individuals are paired. And regardless of the lack of romance, it presents a better love story than the story from Twilight. Objects could be toothpaste and toothbrush, car and person, toilet paper and shit, dustpan and brush...and many more

Ex 1
-Look at John and how he obsessed he is with his car..
-So, it is still a better love story than twilight
Ex 2
-You paid a prostitute to have sex with you?
-still a better love story than twilight

still a better love story than twilight by donthate123 April 27, 2014

It's better to wah than to woosh

It's better to live a happy wonderful life than to perish; or can be a simple fun phrase to tell your friends!

Tim: No please don't kick the chair, Uncle Timmy.
Uncle Timmy: I'm sorry *is about to kick chair from underneath his legs*
Kid: Please, Uncle. It's better to wah than to woosh
Richard:... You're right. *proceeds to kick chair*

It's better to wah than to woosh by FaggitConko69 January 25, 2019

better a smartass than a dumbass

quick witted response given when someone calls you a smartass that furthers your smartassness.

Bill to Bob: "You look like erectile dysfunction!"
Tom: "You know what erectile dysfunction looks like? I'm sorry man."
Bill: "Smartass"
Tom: "Better a smartass than a dumbass"
Bill cries himself to sleep.

better a smartass than a dumbass by unemployed_tom June 28, 2006