you can choose what you eat, you can not choose what you shit

the ridiculous condition of a winner politician who blames the former administrations, to justify the mere fact he is definitely unable.
Who does politics can choose the party to play with, the arguments to fight with, and the equivocal reasons to explain to the electorate, but can not choose the "favourite" priorities, budget deficits, environmental emergencies, and other embarrassing situations.

POLITICIAN: It's not my fault. The former mayor left a huge amount of budget deficit.
TV REPORTER (live): No, man: you can choose what you eat, you can not choose what you shit.

by logao November 4, 2018

if you can make her laugh and giggle you can make that ass clap and jiggle

When you make a girl laugh all the time and you think shes hot

“Bro, you made her laugh”
“So what?”
“Its known that, If you can make her laugh and giggle you can make that ass clap and jiggle”

by Dickandballsguy12 June 27, 2023

open you up like a can of beans

When you imply that you will cut someone like you are opening a can of beans. Or if you mess with the horns you will get stabbed !!!

Keep that sh#t up bro and I will open you up like a can of beans !!!!

by Rosewood1978 February 22, 2017

In Space No-one Can Hear You Scream

Absolute vacuum of space prevents sound waves from travelling and vice-versa.

When the user of a blondes face for sexual purposes finds that the pleasure sensation is too great and wishes to cry out in a manner befitting a scream. Realising to late that In Space No-one Can Hear You Scream...

by Master Of Cunts May 14, 2008

can-u-ere-the-v-tec

Pronounced in a only northern chav/scally accent.
A phrase used only by two types of people.
It can be screamed by F-16 pilots, instead of the customary "booyaa", while flying 2 meters above crowded pedestrian areas.
It is also screamed by Parson cross chavs, from the drivers window of red honda civic type-r as they speed past inferior cars(EG bugatti veyrons, saxos, corsas &/or hyundias).

Ppptttttccccccchhhhhh!!!!!!, can-u-ere-the-v-tec?

by thurcroftdave May 17, 2006

So you think you can rape?

A TV show in which convicted rapists are entered into a Big Brother style house. The ultimate goal of the show is to find the best rapist of those interred. They would have weekly competitions such as Most Violent Rapist, Quickest Rapist, Most Loving Rapist, highest amount of 'I'm sorry's' post coitus etc. the winner would be the publics most favoured Rapist. The prize being facial reconstruction and a new identity.

Matty J: Hey Deano, who's your favourite on this awesome show 'So you think you can Rape?'

Deano: Well I was gunning for Fritzl but the new guy Castro has swung it for me!

Matty J: Gaylord!

by BruffandConlon June 12, 2013

I can neither confirm nor deny

It is a hint to the answer of a question, it works best if you know the person well enough that they can figure out the answer on their own. Emotions & expressions can also hint towards the answer.
Also used if you actually don't know or are trying to cover your company's ass.

"Hey Bob, have you ever seen Iron Man 1 before?"
"I can neither confirm nor deny that"

"Hey Jill, do you have my pencil?"
"I can neither confirm nor deny that"

by tihmmer December 16, 2021