mum cum 

A Woman who is already Married Sleeps with Someone and gets pregnant or Ejaculates.

You had Mum Cum with our Neighbour.

mum cum by yukman July 24, 2011

Mum Spit 

A physical act of affection from a mother, given by the mother by licking her finger and then stroking her now wet finger gently down the cheek of her offspring.

When Joel was sent off to his fist day of school, he was left with mum spit. And was laughed at by Jes.

Mum Spit by Pl@tty October 18, 2008

mum rock 

music predominantly listened to by women of the baby boomer generation. An extension of the term 'Dad rock', including rock music of the LA scene of the 1970s probably termed slightly 'softer' than the male dominated British rock scene. Probably including some soul greats.

"mum rock" picture mum dancing around the living room after a work do regailing you with stories of the time she saw joni mitchell and CSNY at Wembley arena and nearly went to the isle of wight festival, but didn't quite make it.

eg. Big Yellow Taxi - Joni Mitchell
Love the One you're with -stephen stills
Respect - Aretha Franklin
You're so vain - Carly Simon

mum rock by freemum February 16, 2009

Mum-off 

To have a verbal contest over progressively worse mum jokes. It usually goes around full circle before someone gets mummed-out.

Kevin: Your mum's a slapper.
Joe: Your mum is a bigger slapper!
Kevin: Your mum invented being a slapper!
Joe: Your mum wrote the slapper's handbook!
Kevin: Your mum followed every move in the handbook!
Joe: Are you challenging me to a mum-off?
Kevin: Your mum likes a challenge... etc

Mum-off by rob1982 January 3, 2013

Mum Face 

A person with a face like a mum or dinner lady; typically plain, old or generally unprepossessing.

Mum Face (n) or Mum Faced (adj) // Mom Faced (U.S)

Boy #1: That girl has a really hot body.

Boy #2: Yeah, but she's totally mum faced.

Mum Face by PeaHead October 22, 2013

Mum Legs 

When a man has legs like a severely overweight women, this man is so ashamed he should never be allowed to wear shorts.

Generally a middle aged man, usually bald and not fat in himself just the owner of enormous legs sometimes likened to the legs of overweight babies (the tyre look)

Jesus... Cover up those mums! Are you pregnant or something!

Bro those things look like fat baby legs... What's that about!

Lad no amount of buckets will sort those mum legs out...

Fuck fella cow n gate should put those mums legs on show

Mum Legs by MANX PROPHET August 18, 2015

Mum text 

When one receives a text from one's mother. Usually it involves incorrect use of acronyms. For example "LOL" is used for "Lots of love", WTF is used as "Well that's fantastic" and ROFL is a misspelled use of the name of TV presenter and all round good guy, Rolf Harris.

This is also a text with overly abbreviated words to save on the cost of a message despite it not beig 1992 and they don't cost anything on most service plans.

Also, at this time of year (then end of it) you may relieve a mum text at around 9.30pm on new years eve to "beat the rush at midnight" like texts are fighting their way through the traffic of the ether

Mum text. She says "hi D, hpe u gt hme sfly. Yr fat arsd wfe drnk all my wine. ROFL LOL WTF X"

Mum text by Daphne Widethigh April 21, 2018