Penile Epilepsy

The condition responsible for the spasm which occurs immediately prior to premature ejaculation.

Your Mother: "Oh, are you...finished? Already?"
Me: "Damn I TOLD you I got penile epilepsy."

by QuinnFlint August 2, 2011

Penile worms

Small legless invertebrate parasites that occupy the inside of an unclean penile cavity.

I was really in love with Larry. He had such a nice cock and the sex was great. But when those maggot-like penile worms crawled out of his pee-hole, I called it quits pronto. How gross!

by Reguiba November 5, 2010

Penile Pete

A joyful way of greeting a male whos name is peter.

Penile pete...thee creation parkus, wherist thou control thy action!

by MitchellR August 3, 2006

penile curd

The term used in the surgeon's logbook to describe the sort of smeggy excretion produced by all the members of HMS Port Royal after they were all entertained by the same lady in a Port in Jamaica over a three-day period. Widely recognised as an excuse for having no quinine left.

'...Jan 21, 1653. The men are all up against the trots and the penile curd, although the hammocks preclude any buttock-ranging infestations...' Naval Surgeon, HMS Gallant

by ButtoxGalore January 21, 2008

Penile Arrangement

The size, shape and overall appearance of male genitals to include penis, testicles, scrotum and pubes

Jake showed us his penile arrangement at the cabin and praise Jesus I didn't see anything past his untamed pubes

by i5racer August 4, 2010

penile popper

1. An anal retentive tool. A douche bag, but not in the literal sense. An uptight, tight-wad sleeze.

Dude, do you see that penile poppers bling bling? What a shit fucker!

by Ashen Skies. September 20, 2003

penile rivulet

1. a whiny man tantruming over something petty

2. a man that doesn't act his age, especially in social situations with the opposite sex

3. a man that is incapable of performing the most menial tasks

Husband: You didn't starch my socks!

Wife: Stop being such a penile rivulet and do your own goddamn laundry from now on!

OR

"Maybe if you weren't acting like such a penile rivulet, you could have banged that chick."

OR

Office Worker: How do I turn on the copy machine?

Co-Worker: What are you? A penile rivulet?

by Vwortboy July 1, 2009