if dick

When a married guy says he would bang another women if he was single

I would give the hot intern the if dick.

by FromDaRidge March 21, 2017

if you don't like that, you don't like girls

if you don't like whatever the other person says, you don't like girls.

Johnny - How's my new haircut

Ted - If you don't like that, you don't like girls.

by titoliboritz January 22, 2010

if i could i wood

thats is the phrase people say when they cant get a boner
or a new slogan for viagra

my grandpa told me grandma if i could i wood and she said i have have viagra right here sweety cakes

by jack/lucas March 3, 2007

If You Seek Amy

A clever way to not say "fuck me"
F.U.C.K me- sounds like If You Seek Amy

"All of the boys and all of the girls are beggin' to If You Seek Amy"
from Britney Spears's Circus CD

by KJo1204 December 16, 2008

If it's brown, drink it down; if it's black, send it back.

A cautionary guide to the water of Springfield USA wherein residents such as the Simpson family reside.

Billy Corgan: Hey, Homer, looks like our next stop is your hometown, Springfield.
D'Arcy: Is it true that we have to bring our own water?
Homer: We got a little rule back home: if it's brown, drink it down; if it's black, send it back.

by -DF- May 6, 2009

If I had a dime for every time

the indicated event occurs very frequently

If I had a dime for every time I heard that cat growl, I could buy my own orchard.

by The Return of Light Joker January 20, 2008

If only

A retort that means, "What you've just said is plainly not true, although I certainly wish it were."

"I'm never going to call or e-mail you again." "If only!"

"Aren't you worried about the Republicans? Once they get into office, they'll reduce the size of government." "If only!"

by Doctor Whom August 3, 2005