only child

the Only Child is a clever species which mimics the Regular Human. Indistinguishable by simply looking at them, you must get to know an Only Child to know that they are, in fact, an Only Child. As a species they tend to appreciate being alone more so than the Regular Human, and more often like quiet thinking time and don't mind hanging out by themselves. At a young age, all Only Children tend to go through an elongated "brattiness" phase, which tends to be more extreme than that of a Regular Human child. Depending on the parents, the Only Child may eventually grow out of this phase, and surrounded by Regular Human friends, can blend in perfectly. The Only Child has been observed to experience loneliness quite often, and usually feels that this loneliness can be filled best by a relationship, and extreme cases the longing for a relationship can be more important than maintaining the type of friendship observed in the species "Regular Human". However, it is indeed common for an Only Child to fall harder and faster when it comes to relationships, and tend to experience emotions more intensely. If an Only Child has trouble finding an acceptable relationship, they may become uncomfortably hormonal. For example, it is possible that a female only child could even have as many hormones as a 17-year-old male. Which is a fuckton load. Only Children also love Pokemon, especially Wooper.

1. Bro 1: If I ever have kids, I'm def gonna have more than one. I don't want to have to raise a bratty, over-hormonal only child.

2. She must have gotten through her annoying only child phase, because we've been friends for years and I just assumed she had siblings.

3. Duder 1: Man, that bitch is such an only child. When I asked her to fuck she got all emotional and now she's telling people we're dating. WTAF.

by ilovethesilverfox January 2, 2012

e-child

1) the condition that afflicts people who believe the anonymity of the internet allows them to devolve into 6 year olds when they are miffed or disagree with another person's actions or opinions.

2) a condition that affects persons on the internet who achieve some degree of fame or infamy for 15 minutes or so.

1) he knew he was being a complete e-child as he registered the guy who pissed him off for mormon literature, scientology course information and other email garbage.

2) in an act of complete e-childishness the blogger banned every one of his readers who dared ask a question negative to his proscribed beliefs.

by em bee kay1 September 15, 2009

Child Arson

The illegal act of setting fire to kids.

Rob: I heard that he's a convicted child arsonist.

Eddie: What is that?

Rob: He burns kids!

by Farrell Gilmour March 10, 2009

Flower Child

A feel good type of soul, good for the world and environment. Peaceful, maybe not innocent but always looking to make things better even if they aren’t doing well themselves.

The way he carried himself was so amazing, I knew he was a flower child.

by Yubaaan May 28, 2019

trophy child

A child who is pressured into doing well at school to look good for their parents.

Damn, poor Emily - a year ahead in math, she gets a 3.0 in Geometry and her parents flip out! It must suck to be a trophy child.

by Carabear<3 October 21, 2010

child molester

someone that has sex with little kids

kyle depenning likes to have sex with little kids every nite
he is a child molester

by kyle depenning December 9, 2006

problem child

Taken from the John Ritter movie by same name. Used to describe any child, employee, sibling, or friend that is constantly getting into trouble but you are somewhat obligated to care for or help.

Also a street name for someone who gets into trouble all the time.

Frank, the departments problem child, forgot to lock the office last night.

by Blowfish August 17, 2005