A huge huntsman spider found by someone in a relative's house, living under a clock. He took 3 photographs before, presumably, running from the room with terror. the first one is the clock, with the spider's legs poking out from one side of it. the second is a pic of the spider with the clock gone (it's not clear whether the clock has been moved or the spider as moved away from it) and the third one is a horrifyingly detailed close up showing the fur on the spider (eurgh). According to legend, this spider once had a ninth leg which fell off in a battle with limecat and became the being mortals worship as "God". Fools, clock spider will not treat them with mercy when judging them along with worshippers of limecat who will, undoubtedly, be fed to the spider after judgement day. rumor has it that the messenger the spider sends as the "judge" on judgement day will be a humongous piece of cheese, but since the spider will probably have eaten the Jupiter sized king of cheese long before then, who will be sent remains to be seen...
by hatrickpatrick April 7, 2004
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Marge: How did the pig tracks get on the ceiling?!
Homer: spider pig, spider pig, does whatever a spider pig does
Homer: spider pig, spider pig, does whatever a spider pig does
by Rustap August 3, 2007
Get the Spider Pig mug.Elusive Recluse spider, never seen, can be Identified by pungent odor and unique, low barking sound. The main diet of these spiders are assholes. They are known to hang around dark and moist places.
by John bobby November 14, 2006
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Get the Spider shot mug.The Cheesy Hotel Painting Spider is an relatively misunderstood spider that may challenge Clock Spider's and Limecat's role of God to all.
The Cheesy Hotel Painting Spider was in fact once captured and released back into the wild.
The tale begins after a family returned back to their hotel room in Cabo San Lucas after a long day of snorkeling and saying "no" to shady individuals who wanted to sell locally crafted merchandise that was really made in China.
All of a sudden, a spider emerged from behind a Cheesy Hotel Painting with the swiftness of a something really really REALLY fast, the ferocity of a rhinoceros protecting her calf, and using tactics usurping those of the Bushmen of the Kalahari.
After the Spider appeared from a Cheesy Hotel Painring the Father and Son swiftly made weapons, arming themselves with a rubbermaid trash can, a brightly colored beach towel, and Drew Carey's book, Dirty Jokes and Beer.
As the surf pounded the cliffs below, a colony of seagulls cried out like a symphony of organs in D minor. One could smell the crisp sent of the anticipation of the starting of a battle of epic and legendary proportions.
Everyone peed, just a little.
After many minutes, maybe even a dozen minutes, well certainly more than ten, but not more than fifteen minutes, the spider was captured in the trash can and then released outside the hotel room where it pounced once, twice, then thrice into the devilish night.
The Cheesy Hotel Painting Spider was in fact once captured and released back into the wild.
The tale begins after a family returned back to their hotel room in Cabo San Lucas after a long day of snorkeling and saying "no" to shady individuals who wanted to sell locally crafted merchandise that was really made in China.
All of a sudden, a spider emerged from behind a Cheesy Hotel Painting with the swiftness of a something really really REALLY fast, the ferocity of a rhinoceros protecting her calf, and using tactics usurping those of the Bushmen of the Kalahari.
After the Spider appeared from a Cheesy Hotel Painring the Father and Son swiftly made weapons, arming themselves with a rubbermaid trash can, a brightly colored beach towel, and Drew Carey's book, Dirty Jokes and Beer.
As the surf pounded the cliffs below, a colony of seagulls cried out like a symphony of organs in D minor. One could smell the crisp sent of the anticipation of the starting of a battle of epic and legendary proportions.
Everyone peed, just a little.
After many minutes, maybe even a dozen minutes, well certainly more than ten, but not more than fifteen minutes, the spider was captured in the trash can and then released outside the hotel room where it pounced once, twice, then thrice into the devilish night.
The Cheesy Hotel Painting Spider has not yet revealed if it will team up with Clock Spider, or double cross its Huntsman heritage and take sides with Limecat.
by TJGUYBRI January 21, 2010
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by ChickenShiz August 3, 2007
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