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assquatch

A person, typically male, who has more hair on his ass than on his head. An assquatch can also be a person with an unusually hairy ass.
Cover your butt you freakin assquatch.
by Hollywood Texas January 22, 2010
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MAMsquatch

An all-natural, unschooling, ex-vax, alternative medicine promoting, middle aged, sanctiMama. She despises anything mainstream and believes free birthing a large litter is the only way to mom the hardest. Her no shave, not ever mantra, all-natural deodorant, and charcoal toothpaste leave her smelling of bo and gingivitis.
Mamsquatch over there, wants to talk to a manager about acustomer who asked why her kid wasn't in school right now while shamelessly bottle feeding her own baby.
by DelusionsOfAdequacy April 27, 2019
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assquatch

The name of the hairy wad the ends up between your butt cheeks when you wash your hair in the shower.
Ladies...do you ever get that annoying wad of hair between your butt cheeks when you wash your hair in the shower? Its name is assquatch. It is very frightening.
by adabrid August 19, 2013
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Lassquatch

A female version of sasquatch, or a female who possesses the same characteristics of sasquatch, I.E. eating mutton chops, giant feet, over 8 ft. tall etc. May cause blurred vision.
"Hey man! you musta been some kinda drunk to be hitting on that lassquatch last night!"

"It was a bit blurry, but i'm pretty sure that was a lassquatch that devoured your mutton, ma'am."
by Diarrhetoric April 18, 2010
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Assquatch

Guy 1: Hey, what did you get up to yesterday?

Guy 2: Oh, I went to the pool, and in the change room, I saw a really fat, hairy old man taking his trunks off and he had a fucking ASSQUATCH!.
by akendall October 6, 2009
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Assquatch

A person who is such a colosal ass-hole, its nearly mythical.
Person 1. On the way over here this dick cut me off, almost caused a wreck, and had the nerve to flip me off!

Person 2. Sounds like a real assquatch
by Marky-c January 1, 2013
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assquatch

A close cousin to Sasquatch, assquatch is also known as the abominable ass-raper. Enjoys raping anybody and anything it can catch in the ass.
Person: Ooops, I dropped my keys.
Assquatch: Grrrrrrrr!!!!
Person: YOWCH!!!!
by SOAD fan September 26, 2006
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