Jizzard

(Noun) A mystical wizard who ejaculates on your forehead leaving a sparkling teardrop shaped jizzlob right between your eyes, commonly found at an EDM festival. This is a high honor, and those bespeckled should wear it with pride. Note: Do not look directly into the Jizzard's eyes when he blesses you.

"Dude, I had the best time at EDC last month. I even met the Jizzard!"

by CleeTorith February 20, 2023

Jizzheart

A mythical, legendary knite from the 13th century who would defeat his enemies with his immense ejaculations. Legend has it that he fathered over 1000 children throughout Europe over the span of 30 years. Women would travel hundreds of miles just to collect some of his precious baby batter.

After defeating Clitoris Maximus and his mighty army of Cockadonia at the battle of Cum Creek, Sir Landon the Jizzheart mounted his noble steed. While doing so he felt so aroused and triumphant that he released the most immense load of nut butter that it busted through his body armor and shot straight up in the air! As the semen fell to the ground it surrounded Jizzheart and his steed and formed into what appeared to be the shape of a giant heart. As the local towns women came to collect the jizz they realized that it was stuck to the ground and would never come off. Jizzheart knew this was his last battle and would then leave his mark for all eternity. And thus the legend of Sir Landon the Jizzheart was born!

by Roy Caceras February 4, 2009

Jizzard Blizzard

Jizzard Blizzard is a sex act in which 5 men and 1 woman gather in a meat freezer. Once in the freezer the men surround the woman and then proceed to masturbate into fans aimed at the woman, so that their jizz is blown onto the girl at once like a blizzard.

Person number 1

"Hey man I was feelin' adventurous so me and my buddies gave my woman a jizzard blizzard!"
Person number 2

"Thats ill, how was it?"
Person number 1
"It was a bit cold."

by Dragonsomen April 17, 2014

Jizzard

A Jizzard is a Blizzard made out of Jizz. It may also refer to a parody of The Blizzard of Oz, The Jizzard of Drake. for an example

Ozzy:"Hey man, have you listened to my Blizzard of Oz album?"
Zakk:"Yeah, I have, but I prefer the Jizzard of Zakk, haha."

by UncleJizzy April 4, 2010

jizzard wand

The wand held by a Jizzard at all times, especially while watching hentai or browsing furry pics

Darker Jizzard: My jizzard wand holds the dreams of my people, thus, the dreams of my people are in my hands.

by Sand Acres July 16, 2016

Jizzberry

The act of masturbating, and holding in your cum until your penis turns purple. Then slowly releasing it on her left eye

"you should jizzberry her, she sucks, and she's just waiting for it"

"your mom needs an eye-patch, because i jizzberried her a week ago and shes still hittin' walls"

by adriansucks May 19, 2010

Jizzard

The reason the world will end in 2012. Dairy Queen's overpriced products will trigger DQ product designers to desperately create a mixture of porn and ice cream to promote sales: the "Jizzard." The resulting atrocity will herald the collapse of the Earth's civilizations.

I would like a number 69 with an Oreo Breasticle Jizzard instead of the Pepsi.

Thanks, that'll be 6.90 at the window.

by Mighara June 26, 2010