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Baconing

n. A common cure for most diseases. However, because of its
deliciousness and addictiveness, it has been outlawed in most areas. Similiar to medicinal marijuana

v. To bacon is to apply the ideals of the bacon-like nature to any situation.
Alex: "David, I got aids from that ho last night."
David: "Don't worry, I'll get the bacon."

David: "Dude, I got an F in spanish."
Alex: "Baconing?" *Pulls out bacon, milestone reached*
by AlexWhiteRules September 22, 2010
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Baconing

The action of whipping someone's bottom or ear using the fingertips of a relaxed hand, to cause the recipient pain and mild humiliation. Baconing of the ear is particularly painful on a cold day. Etymology thought to originate from schools of the Isle of Wight in the mid-1990s.
"I just got a right bad baconing from John."
by Wight Trash December 29, 2012
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Fake Baconing

The act of driving to a parking lot, dialing 911 on a burner phone, and attempting to masturbate and finish before police arrive.
Todd was fake baconing, trying to bust a thrill nut last week and he caught a charge for indecent exposure. He's looking at a third strike situation since he had a firearm and blow in the car with him. I don't know what to tell his family, man. His daughter's third birthday is next week. That kid doesn't stand a chance.
by Oh, hayyyy November 27, 2022
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Baconing

Dating a freshmen in high school from any age
Luke is baconing
by Ohio Sigma March 27, 2024
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baconking

a fucking dumbass that thinks he's funny by being annoying
shut the fuck up you ain't baconking
by nicked1337 June 15, 2025
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Kevin-Baconing

Kevin-Baconing (verb): When you're stressed, mad or frustrated and all you can do is go to an empty warehouse (or whatever space is accessible to you at the time) and dance around—typically in a flailing manner—using machinery and other objects as gymnastics equipment to express your deepest emotions. Upon Kevin-Baconing, you feel like a weight has been lifted. You find that you are no longer the ghost of Kevin Bacon (aka Ren McCormack). Instead, you are yourself again... but way better.
Hey so I have to cancel plans tonight. Work was a real bitch. I'll be in my garage Kevin-Baconing until I feel better. Hit you up after.
by Tom Ato December 2, 2022
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