wank

predominantely British term for masturbation

Buffing the Banana
Holding Your Sausage Hostage
Jackin' the Beanstalk
Rounding up the Tadpoles
Slap Boxing the One-Eyed Champ
Spank the Frank
Applying the hand brake
Attacking the one-eyed purple-headed warrior
Auditioning the finger puppets
Beef-stroke-it-off
Boxing the bald champ
Charming the snake
Checking for testicular cancer
Choking Kojak
Squeezing the cream from the flesh Twinkie
Straddle your paddle
Taking matters into your own hands
Teasing the weasel
Thumping the pump
Tickling the pickle
etc etc

by Master Bates March 23, 2003

wankness

The skill required to work as an IT support person in West Yorkshire

John tried hard at his job but couldn't help his inherent wankness showing through.

by subnet zero January 15, 2009

Wank

1. A slang term for masturbation that originated in Britain.
2. A word that describes something that is very poor/terrible.

1)

A: "I heard Jake broke up with Charlotte"
B: "Yeah, he's probably at home, wanking"

2)

A: "Did you see that film?"
B: "Yeah, it sucked. Utter wank."

by EvilFruitPie May 16, 2011

wank

The act of self masturbation (verb)

Hey John, wanna go catch a beer?
No, I think I'm just going to go home and have a wank.

by terriblequiche August 10, 2006

wanked

past tense: slang term for masturbation

1. The boy wanked himself.

by Katrina ((Kitty)) September 27, 2005

wank

the voice inside someones head that tells them to do and say unexplainable things.

he is similar to an infection, anyone can get sick with him, but once he is there he never leaves.

Simon - “why did you do that”

Tom - “it wasnt me it was wank”

by prouddaddyof3 April 27, 2023

Wanking

to grip your hand around your penis and pull up and down ... to cause an ejaculation

ha ... y sick minded person ... ud like to know wouldnt u!

by duuuude April 13, 2004