if my aunt had balls she'd be my uncle 

Used to describe the pointlessness of the word if. Similar to but better to use than "if ifs and buts were candy and nuts Christmas would be every day."

If I had some money I'd pay you that money back. Well if my aunt had balls she'd be my uncle.

if my aunt had balls she'd be my uncle by Adam7172 September 17, 2016

If your aunt had a penis she'd be your uncle 

A phrase used to disregard an unimportant and often times obvious detail. Used when that detail is used to divert attention from the topic at hand.

Little Girl 1: Why'd you eat my pudding?
Little Girl 2: My aunt is a doctor and she says eating too much pudding makes you fat.
Little Girl 1: And if your aunt had a penis she'd be your uncle, what's that got to do with why you ate my fucking pudding?

If your aunt had a penis she'd be your uncle by Action_kamen November 5, 2010

uncle duncle 

to take a shite

hey i'm busting for a shite hurry up in the bathroom i need to go see uncle duncle asap.

uncle duncle by Dan the Man From Manchester May 6, 2018

Uncle Dad 

A father who takes being the 'fun dad' so far that the role he plays in his children's life is more like an uncle. Do the kids need a trip to the dentist? Do they have homework? What are they having for dinner? He hasn't a clue - but he will occasionally take them out to a ball game. Often a non-custodial parent.

Oh hey, Uncle Dad sent me a birthday email and a $20 gift card to Baskin Robbins. I'm lactose intolerant and it's actually my sister's birthday, but... it's the thought that counts, I guess.

Uncle Dad by Mai Ainsel March 7, 2019

uncle demask

A medical condition in which the cranium swells to more than twice its normal size, resulting in an angry red color. Usually accompanied with an unquenchable desire to administer corporal punishment

When he didn't receive his refund check he went uncle dWebImagesVideosShoppingMore
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When his refund check didn't come, he went uncle demask. From that point forward no ass was safe

uncle demask by v ferragamo February 6, 2015

Uncle Dane 

Uncle Dane is an engineer main in the game Team Fortress 2. He usually makes tips and tricks for engineer mains. He wears a white beard and a white hat with magical power from Uncle Dane's nephews.

TF2 Guy 1: Hey, what about random crits?

TF2 Guy 2: Jeez. I hate those things.

TF2 Guy 1: Don't Pull an Uncle Dane.

Uncle Dane by MemeZ The Memelord April 1, 2019

Uncle Drew 

He is Kyrie Irving dressed up as an old man and wrecks it up on the basketball court in a pepsi max commercial

Yoo did you see pepsi max commercial with uncle drew

Yea thats kyrie irving he was tearing up those young bloods out there

Uncle Drew by Tolcott March 25, 2013