TURDle wax

Get a girl naked..preferably one you dislike. Have her lie naked on the bed face down. Tell her you have to use the bathroom. While in the bathroom, shit just far enough out of your ass so the shit hangs a good couple inches. When you come out of the bathroom run and slide across her back like you would across the hood of a car.

I saw this Bitch i hated. So I decided to TURDle wax her!

by allen bak February 22, 2008

turtle waxed

Similiar to a mudslide, only instead of a body part you slide your shitty ass on, your target is an automobile.

That son of a bitch took my parking spot again, so I turtle waxed his piece of shit Honda.

by Madmike the Malevolent January 27, 2007

Turtle Waxing

Turtle Waxing is when a male gets close to ejaculating during sexual activities, lays his partner flat on a surface (bed,table,couch....) so that the partner is facing upwards towards him while he hovers over the partner and ejaculates onto the partner's stomach which he then rubs the fluid around on the chest area giving the partner's chest a glossy turtle wax look to it.

Man 1: Dude, guess what I did to my girlfirend last night.

Man 2: What did u do to her?

Man 1: I was Turtle Waxing her all night long!

Man 2: I wish my girlfriend would let me do that.

by Gangstermac January 13, 2014

[turtle waxer]

A man that is pussy whipped

Mike is such a turtle waxer. He ditched us to go shopping with his girlfriend.

by nick clementseee January 28, 2009

Turdle Wax

When you’re receiving a handjob and you have to take a shit, so your partner open palm catches it and proceeds to use your turd to jerk you off.

Glenn really enjoys when chicks turdle wax him after a his pineapple pizza’s.

by Cracklized November 15, 2017

Waxing the turtle

To consume larger quanities of marijuana at one time. To polish the "green".

Timmy and i just got done "waxing the turtle".

by drhandbanana May 29, 2010

Akron Turtlewax

The act of shitting on a car, especially when the feces are smeared all over, including on door handles.

I was running late for work and discovered that my ex left an Akron Turtlewax on my hood. I couldn't even open the door because there was poo on the handle.

by invisiblehand March 12, 2015