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petrified penguin

When one lies on top of another pinning then down, urinates allover them, and yells "PETRIFIED PENGUIN!!"
Jake: "Hey look! Arielle is giving Alex a petrified penguin!"
petrified penguin by Dirty P November 1, 2013

petrified grape 

Guy 1: Is that a petrified grape?

Guy 2: No, it's raisin.

Guy 1: Wait, isn't that the same thing. Guy 2: No.

petrified sock 

(n.) A white tube sock that serves as a jizz recepticle following masturbation. After a series of loads have been deposited in the sock, the protein stains will harden, thus beginning the "petrification" process. Also see protein sock
1. My petrified sock has been the recipient of so many loads, it is now brown and can now stand up by itself.
petrified sock by Shockey86 January 31, 2005

Petrified Tree 

When, during intercourse, the penis becomes numb due to under stimulation. The male equivalent of Zombie Beaver. Useful for Cock-Slapping, Cock-stands, Tripod-ing, etc.
Janet was so begrudgingly wide that I got the good 'ol Petrified Tree. After that, I charmingly berated her, and cock-slapped her with my rock-solid Mahogany Staff.

Petrified Seman 

Seman on a peice of clothing or towel that has dried up and is now crusted on to said objects.
I just found an old sock that is covered in petrified seman.
Petrified Seman by Contazz March 6, 2010

petrified wood 

a boner or erection lasting for many hours
Lauren throught it was strange that Stephen's petrified wood wasn't going away.
petrified wood by k blau July 23, 2006