Not the daddy dance

On the maury show, when a paternity test shows that the man being tested is not the father, and the woman runs off like a trick ass ho, this is the dance that the man does. The man usually does it with elaborate flourish, including but not limited to:
1. Asking female audience members for phone numbers.
2. High-fiving or pounding members of the audience.
3. Helping the janitors clean backstage in a fit of joy.
4. Cartwheels

Such dances increase in satisfaction when more people have been tested by the woman, and also in proportion to the percentage sure the woman is that he is the father (i.e. a woman who claims to be 100% sure that the man is the father will get a lesser dance than one who claims to be 1000% sure.)

Maury: "You are NOT the father!"
Trick ass ho: "Oh Lawd!" (runs offstage)
Not the daddy: "HELL YEAH! I TOLD YO ASS! TRIFLIN' ASS SKANK!" (Cartwheel leading into other elaborate moves in the not the daddy dance.

by Dirty V May 13, 2006

Not the full ticket

Not clinically sane; Not all there; One sandwich short of a picnic.

'Have you seen that weirdo over there shouting at people as they walk past?", "Yeah, he's not the full ticket, is he?"

by Jo 4 Jamie January 16, 2006

not the brightest lightbulb in the chandelier

as defined by the reality TV show Forensic Mysteries on HLN, this a synonym phrase for "not the brightest person around"

boy 1) yo come to my backyard, i want to start a party by going out to weed

boy 2) are you an uptard, your dad, or mom will notice.

boy 1) nope my mom is not even home from work and my dad is not the brightest lightbulb in the chandelier, he will think we are trying to burn Cheetos on the barbecue or something.

by Sexydimma March 16, 2013

Not the yellow of the egg

The words that come out of the mouth of any German that doesn't speak English well. Generally pronounced "not ze ielloo of ze ek"

A (american): *insert compliated English sentence here*
B (german): Sorry, my English is not the yellow of the egg, I do not understand.

by Professional German Idiot Guy April 11, 2020

not the baby daddy dance

The dance that black and white males do when they realize they are not the daddy of a baby from a whore they slept with twice. This can often be seen on the Maury show when a paternity test is taken. Often the mother says she is 125% sure to 250% the baby is his, but then is shut down as the man performs the baby daddy dance.

Maury: you are not the father
Man: ahhh damn wacth me dance this one out
woman:its lying its not true i was 200% shore

" djew see that guy bust that not the baby daddy dance? yeah he played that one right out.

by purplestickypunch88 May 24, 2007

Not The Onion

A disclaimer used when sharing a news article, announcing that the content is absurd, but real. It references the satirical news outlet The Onion.

Joe: Not The Onion- Republicans are proposing a law to implement criminal charges on women who have miscarriages.

by Scotialist August 12, 2011

not the sharpest tool in the shed

A gentle way to say that someone is just unintelligent.

-Danny failed his third test this week.
-Well, he's not not the sharpest tool in the shed, you know.

by Golan September 23, 2005