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Cocksucking Attorney

1. Incorporates August 30, 2007 definition of the word Cocksucker.
2. Applies to attorneys who take one position on a legal matter.
3. However, in court, they actively exploit the legal matter to their benefit, to the detriment of others.
4. Typically used in situations related to poor ethics where the attorney puts their own personal interest ahead of their client or the courts.
1. (Class Action Settlement) "Did you hear about that settlement for the iThingy Defect? I got .38 cents for it and the attorneys at Dewey, Cheatem, and Howe told us they were doing this out of principle, and not looking for a payday, yet they received $62 million. Those Cocksucking Attorneys!"

2. (Litigation) "I can't believe the courts sanctioned me for bringing a frivolous lawsuit. Schlosky told my case was solid, made me pay him $5,000 to file this lawsuit, and now I have to pay a $10,000 fine to the court! Michael is such a Cocksucking Attorney!

3. (Public Debate) "Did you read Einhorn's argument against using waivers to disclaim fraud in court? Yet this guy is using the same tactics to get his dirty client off the hook? How can this Cocksucking Attorney sleep at night."

4. (Conflict of Interest) "I found out today that Lisa, my attorney for the malpractice suit that left me disabled, is a cousin for the doctor we're suing. How can I trust her when she's spending holidays with that monster. I now question everything she's ever told me about this case, and need to fire her ASAP. She is such a Cocksucking Attorney."

5. (Poorly managed expectations) "That Cocksucking Attorney Ralph told us to expect a windfall from being insulted by the waitress of Bojangles, we paid him over $100,000 to represent us, and all we got were coupons for free pancakes".
by JusticeThePup March 22, 2023
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aktard

A person who derives vastly more enjoyment from drawing people into his tiresome rants than actually participating in whatever he is ranting about. Named after a participant on an auto racing forum who spends five days ranting online about tiresome minutiae for every two days spent racing.
"Aktards only serve to drive people away from the forums."

"After a short time, people will get tired of aktarded behavior and they'll just want the aktard to go away."
by Club Racer December 7, 2006
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Related Words
Aktor actor Astoria attorney actorvist Artorias actoring Aitor Ator Atoriel

akorede

A very strong willed person. Once he wants to do something he always does it. Loving and caring. Oh a very good kisser
Akorede is a good boyfriend
by sergeant handsome April 12, 2017
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Eric Holder - Attorney General

Eric Holder is a perfect example of a token puppet nigger appointed to the position of U.S. Attorney General that functions as dictated by a racially biased, self-serving, administration that will not uphold the law with respect to any legal issue that may reflect negatively on blacks, whom they rely on to further their political agenda(s). At the time of this writing, two major issues face this scum sucking moolie. The first being the refusal to pursue black on white crime as 'hate' crime, even though it is obvious to everybody that this was the motive. The second is the 'Fast and Furious' scandal that ultimately helped cause the deaths of law enforcement personnel. The agenda here being the false argument in favor of banning semi-automatic firearms, claiming they are falling into the hands of criminals across the border. This of course they would hope would open the flood gates to still more forms of gun control in an attempt to disarm the American public.
That shitstain Eric Holder - Attorney General is refusing to present documents relating to the Fast and Furious scandal to congress. I hope they don't just nail the spook for contempt, but throw his worthless watermelon ass in the slammer with some Aryan Brotherhood folks. Ever see the videos of this coon talking about brainwashing America’s youth against firearms? A prime example of how a nigger feels this country should be run.
by Larry Major In Omaha September 24, 2012
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Ace Attorney

A courtroom/crime drama series by Capcom which started in Japan in 2001 as a GameBoy Advance game called Gyakuten Saiban. More commonly identified by its rather popular titular character, Phoenix Wright. You basically have to investigate every crime, with some interesting/annoying characters along the way then battle it out in the courtroom with prosecutors who are German or arrogant as f***. Also, 3 of the games have the assistants underage for no goddamn reason. Has currently 5 games released in the US, 7 in Japan (not including one spinoff) and one announced for both regions. Has a crapton of Mangas and Artbooks. Also has quite the supply of rabid fangirls who are guaranteed to ship every two characters in the series together. ALL OF THEM. Their fans are dedicated to the series, to the point that when the main character changed for once most of them were so angry Phoenix Wright had to get back. Also, has many ask roleplay blogs on Tumblr.

Titular Characters: Phoenix Wright, Apollo Justice, Miles Edgeworth
Fangirl: OH EM GEE THIS TWO I SHIP THEM TOO MUCH EEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEK *faints*

Person 1: OBJECTION!
Person 2: SHUT UP.

Fan: APOLLO JUSTICE SUCKS PHOENIX WRIGHT FTW

Fangirl: EDGEWORTH!!!!111one!!! *faints*

Fan: Guys, the new Ace Attorney game has Phoenix Wright again!
Other Fans: YESSSSSS!!!

*insert Tumblr here*
by Donnman March 18, 2013
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Astormic

Bright and striking in a way that is both powerful and beautiful, like some thunderstorms.
Your eyes look so astormic today! I love them!

The picture of the lightning striking the tower is really astormic... I should make it my wallpaper!
by Logska December 16, 2021
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a paid actor

When something does it’s “job” well
Person1: wow this picture of you looks bomb!
Person2: Right? The sun was a paid actor
by original hot mommy October 4, 2022
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