Schlonger

The term for a penis so large that anyone who sees it turns to stone due to sheer jealousy. It is said that a man many years ago possessed the infamous "Schlonger" but used it's power for evil, forcing a valiant warrior to slice the penis clean off and hide it so that no one else would get jealous of the massive meat stick. The current location of the Schlonger is unknown.

Jerry: "Have you heard the legend of the Schlonger?"

Bill: "It's not a legend. Look at my huge penis!"

Jerry: "..."

Bill: "Jerry? Jerry?! Crap, he's turned to stone. Shouldn't have abused my schlonger."

by Voltron22 August 6, 2012

schmogerty

Has the qualities of being a great, fun dance-rock song.

"This song is just not schmogerty enough for my tastes."

by DudeWhoLikesTodd October 23, 2011

der weiner schlinger

An over-the-shoulder devise used by an oversized man that shoots Fairbury hotdogs to distracted Husker fans at Nebraska sporting events.

"Der weiner schlinger has got to go!"

by andersonland.org June 30, 2004

schloinker

An affectionate term for one's penis.

My schloinker brought it's A game today.

by I am me and sometimes why April 2, 2010

Schrodinger's Keys

When car keys are misplaced, their location is unknown as well as their non-location. Therefore, they exist as a wave function in all locations which collapses upon observation of the keys following The Heisenberg-Schrodinger Lost Key Postulate. Which also hypothesized that you cannot simultaneously know the locations something isn't and not know where it is.

That party was wild, lost my keys but I found them in the FREEZER this morning! You really dont know where your keys aren't till you find them, totally like Schrodinger's Keys!!!

by aalh November 12, 2014

Schrödinger's Can

A beverage can that has been open for days and may or may not have a bug in it. You can't see into the can to get a clear answer, therefore the can simultaneously does and doesn't have a bug in it until you pour out the whole thing and see for yourself.

"I wouldn't drink that, man. It's been out for a while. It's a real Schrödinger's can at this point."

by BoredCollegeKid April 6, 2016

Schrodinger's Handjob

When you tittyfuck a girl who has a flat chest so its not really a "handjob" but its also not really a "Tittyfuck"

man 1 - "Bro i just got a great tittyfuck from my girlfriend"

man 2 - "bro your gf is super flat are you sure it wasn't just a Schrodinger's Handjob"

by Beastman723 April 7, 2017