I'm calling the police

A term used when someone does something extremely bad, weird, fucked up, degenerative, sexual, horny, frowned upon, or just something that makes your stomach feel like shit, or makes your heart actually fucking stop for a second because you need to catch a breath after seeing what bullshit someone posts or say. This term can also be used on sexual messages, if someone is being weird, people typically reply with "I'm calling the police" "What the fuck", and "FBI OPEN UP!". The phrase / slang "I'm calling the police" is an effective way to tell someone to shut the fuck up, and for them to reconsider their life before saying something again or to tell someone your really fucked up and need psychotic help now. The term is similar to replying the suicide hotline number "1-800-273-TALK (8255)" , to tell someone to call it, and seek mental help (since they probably do tbh).

Guy 1: What were you doing? It's been like 6 hours!.

Guy 2: Jacking off to changed rule 34.

Guy 1: I'm calling the police and the fucking FBI to throw yo horny ass in the slammer.
Guy 1: Bouta fuckin teach this degenerate nigga ass mothafucka some goddamn justice.

by Adolf Hitler and Joseph Stalin September 20, 2023

I'm too pretty for this

saying that a narcissistic person like you says

teacher: guys, next class we have an exam
student: yeah, I'm too pretty for this

by wcam.mmm September 20, 2023

I'm bored

I wrote this definition because as the title suggests IM BORED

Please God give me strength I'm bored

by Imbored9876 September 25, 2023

I'm trapped

I have been trapped in this basement for 30 years, I'm dying, there are no more rats for me to kill. My body is eating itself I am writing for the hope someone sees this and gets me out of this basement I am dying

I'm trapped and I have been trying to get out for 15 years I am hoping and praying for God to let me out pray for me whoever sees this I am no longer able to drink my pee I am dying I ran out of food 5 days ago

by Imbored9876 September 26, 2023

I'm Killed

Another way of saying "I'm dead"

Haha I'm killed XD

Dude just told a funny joke, I'm killed.

He thought he ate that, I'm killed.

by X9od September 28, 2023

I'm So Bored

Words uttered by an individual when they are experiencing the feeling of being too much of a lazy shit. Perhaps if this person would get off Urban Dictionary ffs and their slimy ass, and actually touched grass, then they would be magically cured of their boredom. Yes, I'm talking about you. Yes, this is a self-callout. Go sniff the sun instead of your ass, you fruitbat vampire fuck.

Kylie: I'm so boreddd.
Weslie: Go fuck yourself.

by Where'd mah dad go? October 9, 2023

I'm sorry, I can hear that I've made you quite upset.

I'll tell them I never wanted it.
I'll tell them who you are to me.
I'll tell them that I'm safe with you.
I'll tell them...

"That man is my husband, the one person that has always been there for me, the one person that has always kept me safe, the one person who has always helped me through everything... Is the one person I can't talk to. The person I need I'm not allowed to see..."
I'm sorry, we have a duty of care, our primary roll is to make sure you're safe, the severity of these allegations-
"Have you ever done ICE?"
No...
"Well then with all due respect, how can you be the judge on someone's character when you've never experienced what it's like on that day, that mindset-"
I may never have personally experienced it but I have seen, quite closely, the effects of the substance and am very aware of it's effects. I know this is disappointing to hear, but we can't just wave a magic wand and make it all disappear, even if you retract your statement the allegations and severity of the case is so extreme and we have a duty of care to you.

I'm sorry, I can hear that I've made you quite upset.

by S.W.A.L.K.J.F.P.J.P. October 13, 2023