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Pillsbury Baking Process

In today's day and age we don't have time to do our daily activities. We must learn to multitask in order to be as efficient as possible. How could one possibly expand their anus and make Pillsbury brand biscuits at the same time if not by the use of the Pillsbury Baking Process. The goal of the process is simple; it is not only to stretch out ones rectum, but also to bake some nice, crispy Pillsbury brand biscuits in the meantime.

The steps are as follows:

Step 1: Insert an unopened tin container of Pillsbury Brand Biscuits up your anus, be sure to open the sphincter to avoid causing damage.

Step 2: Once the tin is entirely submerged within the lining of your anus, go for an extensive period of exercise. Go for a run, a mountain bike adventure, or whatever your heart desires. The goal is to raise your internal body temperature.
Step 3: During the height of your workout, if all steps of the process were done correctly you will hear a significant *pop* sound. Do not worry. This is natural as the tin has opened thanks to the significant increase in pressure due to the increase in surrounding temperature.
Step 4: Let the biscuits drop onto the floor and be prepared to enjoy your new anus AND your fresh biscuits.
Son: Mother, I heard a popping noise come from your tuchus, did you happen to break your hip?
Mother: Do not be afraid, young child. For I was just using the Pillsbury Baking Process to craft some rolls for our family dinner on this fine evening. Would you like one?
Son: Oh hell yeah I love booty biscuits.
Mother: Well thanks to the Pillsbury Baking Process they'll slide right out.
by Not Jung God October 2, 2018
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A Super Quantum Unit Intel Processer or SQUIP for short is a gray oblong pill containing a micro super computer from japan, that when eatten, it travels through your blood till it implants itself in your brain. Once in your brain, it appears as an avatar, with it being any thing, whether it be Keanu Reeves, Batman, A anime cat girl and more that user decides. It uses algorithms to figure out how to raise yourself in the social latter in life for say, whether it be being popular in school, or making it to broadway.
Welcome to your Super Quantum Unit Intel Processer, your SQUIP
by LonleyWeeb November 26, 2020
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procraptinate

The act of delaying a shit purely due to laziness or lack of willingness to get up.

This can be due to the engagement in an activity such as drinking, being in the cinema, watching TV or chatting with friends.
"Man, I was bursting for a shit, but I was watching TV so I just procraptinated for a bit."

"I so would've won that poker game if I could've procraptinated for longer!"
by Whilding87 June 7, 2007
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Procrascination

The act of running away from revision or an important deadline by becoming passionately interested in something which would normally be boring. Usually induced by a combination of stress and the internet.
"I shouldn't have gone on Wikipedia - I got a procrascination for the moons of Jupiter and now I've got to write fifteen thousand words on the Spanish civil war by tomorrow."

"I failed my degree because I developed a procrascination for finding the optimal way to use the golden mushroom in Mario Kart 64."
by Autonova April 25, 2010
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Proceleme

black black black black black black black black black black black black black
black: proceleme

black: black
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black black black black
by ХапапЖабаПро March 20, 2022
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Duel Score Processor

A hoe that processes two cocks at the same time. One in the front and one in the back. These hoes can process up to 1.5 Ghz (jizz-a-hurtz) Dual core processors are the successor of the single core. And are considered a lot "faster."
Nikki: Hey playaz bring those hard drives over here and let this duel score processor take over!

Sal and Rob: I guess this calls for some sexternal hard drives! *high fives*
by Da Quizzler October 13, 2011
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procrast

1. I am being such a procrast right now by adding this to Urban Dictionary.
2. Stop being such a waste of life procrast.
by Sickashell March 31, 2008
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