carpedonktum

Latin meaning 'seize the ass' refers to an unemployed coward who hides behind anonymity while letting his wife be the man of the house so he can stay at home and bitch online. Generally tries to provoke others for the very things he is guilty of himself with pathetic hypocrisy. His lashing out is a side effect of his own short comings and failures in life. Has anger issues toward everyone else due to his string poor decisions which started at birth. A next level keyboard warrior who inspires other keyboard warriors with equally weak minds.

That carpedonktum is really trying to belittle "welfare queens" online when he is in fact a "wefare king" - I hope his wife stops paying for his internet until he gets a actual job.

by CoulrophobicJuggalo July 11, 2019

carked

when you drink loads of alcohol and feel really drunk

Me and Divu got carked up yesterday on 2 buds, get me jigga

by montu October 5, 2006

carved

moderately rotten. not as bad as chiseled.

That singing performance was pretty carved.

by gabs007 May 19, 2006

Cardenas

Verb. To not obtain enough of something.

I wanted to run for State Treasurer this year, but I Cardenas'd the signatures.

My political career is over because I Cardenas'd support.

by Tony V. June 11, 2018

Carpediem

A Runescape word for the best clan out there. Also known as seizing the day, raping children.

"Dude Jimmy, I'm so ready to Carpediem some kids!" Said Alan. "FFS I KNOW ITS GONNA BE 1337!@!@!@!" SAID ALAN.

by Inub June 9, 2010

carled

The act of being violently murdered over anything less than 20 dollars, such as Carl from Grand Theft Auto does.

Jim: My friend was just killed!

bob: over what?

Jim: I think he got carled

Bob: bummer

by SQUISHYMAN June 15, 2010

Carved Blumkin- [a.e.: "Carvin' up a Blumkin!", esp. prison lexicon]

Carved Blumkin- a.e.: "Carvin' up a Blumkin!", esp. prison lexicon- a festive sex act perpetrated upon new inmates upon their being processed into central lock up and the main prison population in American Prisons- usually occasioned on but not exclusive to Halloween. Turning a new inmate into a "carved blumkin" usually involves his person being purchased as a "wife" (read: "bitch"), in exchange for cigarettes or other such bartered items- as opposed to his merely remaining another bartered item himself (read "everybody's fuck). The act of "carving a blumkin" is therefore both a marital and Hallows Eve ceremonial process of incarceration. The celebration begins with general crotch grabbing by the guests, bachelor, and best men. This is followed immediately by smuggled spoons percussed against the bars, (a clever substitution for wedding bells), calling all to the the altar (read: commode) for the fraternal ritual defecation- followed thereupon with more spoons beating upon the bars, prompting the bachelor to carry his unsuspecting object of adoration directly to his bunk in an act of non consensual conjugal sex (read rape), as a rite of dysfunctional sexual passage... in more ways than one (read: anally). The beating of spoons on bars during the "carving of the blumkin" is the origin for many of our traditions on the outside, such as ringing spoons upon glasses to make the bride and groom kiss upon command.

Carved Blumkin- a.e.: "Carvin' up a Blumkin!", esp. prison lexicon - "Ohhh, hell yeah, check out tha' new 'fish'! Awwww! Is gom be one helluva Happy mutha freakin' all Hollowed Out eve full o' sweet new meat all up in hea! Woop woop! Soon as I pinch off dis heah loaf, I gon carve me up a piece o'dat fine assed Blumkin o' his with dis hea niggaz Holloweeny!!!"

by StalinLovesCIAfakeMSM March 2, 2013