by jenna bee January 28, 2009
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by r00stre67 March 1, 2021
Get the Chelsea Nichole Bernd mug.A city in southern California bereft of fun. The best thing to do there is to pack up and get the fuck out. It smells like urban decay and broken dreams. It also smells like raw sewage for some reason, though after careful investigation you won't find any processing plant. More likely it's the high concentration of ghetto-ass people.
Only notable for being the origin of the McDonalds franchise in 1940. Nothing significant has happened since. Not that it matters, because most of the inhabitants here are so ignorant and shallow that it wouldn't matter if the most important human discovery had taken place here; no one would care. Give them American Idol and Twilight and they are perfectly happy to ignore anything else.
Only notable for being the origin of the McDonalds franchise in 1940. Nothing significant has happened since. Not that it matters, because most of the inhabitants here are so ignorant and shallow that it wouldn't matter if the most important human discovery had taken place here; no one would care. Give them American Idol and Twilight and they are perfectly happy to ignore anything else.
by WickedLife7 May 11, 2011
Get the San Bernardino mug.is a city where you would literally get your ass ate by a tweaker its bad bro foos be tweaking it and the whole city be smelling like ass cheeks
hey fred did you go to that bootleg wanna be mall on waterman san bernardino ?
fred: yeah john its literally gay it smelled like shit
fred: yeah john its literally gay it smelled like shit
by anonymous December 28, 2020
Get the san bernardino mug.The most scientific scale known to man for rating the desired mouth-to-phallus ratio during the practice of oral sex. On one end of the spectrum, we have Bernadette Peters with a diminutive mouth. We'll assign her oral cavity a value of .99 carollas (unit of measurement named after Adam Carolla, a pioneer in the field of Phallometry, whose Water-Displacement Method is now the standard throughout the Penile Sciences). Multiplying this value by the average human penis size (100 carollas) yields a Carolla Psychological Satisfaction (or C.P.S.) score of 99 aces (as in, "That's just aces!"). On the other end of the spectrum, we have the less desirable orifice of Sandra Bernhard measuring .01 carollas. Once again, multiplying this value by 100 yields a score of 1 ace. This indicates that the experience of inserting the male member into Bernhard's mammoth mouth for the purpose of fellatio, while perhaps physically pleasurable, is overshadowed by the pride-shattering effects.
Monica Lewinsky: Hey, Bill, you want a BJ?
President Clinton: (covers mouthpiece of the phone he's holding) Monica, I'm on the phone with a Congressman. Sorry about that sir. (inaudible chatter from phone) Yeah, just some intern I'm banging. About a 7. But you should see the mouth on her. (more inaudible chatter) What's the Bernadette-Bernhard scale? (more chatter) Adam who? Oh, I love Birchum.
Monica Lewinsky: Bill, I'm wearing that blue dress you like.
President Clinton: Congressman, I've gotta go. But you've sure given me something to think about. Maybe I'll just work her over with a cigar.
Morgan Freeman Narrator: But he didn't. Well he did. But he also got oral. Completely rejecting the principles of the Bernadette-Bernhard scale. Two things were lost that day: America's innocence, and the confidence of the pretty well-endowed Leader of the Free World. It just goes to show you, some birds aren't meant to be caged, their feathers are too bright. But in such a massive cage, who can see a bird anyway? Get it on. Got to get it on. No choice but to get it on. Mandate, get it on.
President Clinton: (covers mouthpiece of the phone he's holding) Monica, I'm on the phone with a Congressman. Sorry about that sir. (inaudible chatter from phone) Yeah, just some intern I'm banging. About a 7. But you should see the mouth on her. (more inaudible chatter) What's the Bernadette-Bernhard scale? (more chatter) Adam who? Oh, I love Birchum.
Monica Lewinsky: Bill, I'm wearing that blue dress you like.
President Clinton: Congressman, I've gotta go. But you've sure given me something to think about. Maybe I'll just work her over with a cigar.
Morgan Freeman Narrator: But he didn't. Well he did. But he also got oral. Completely rejecting the principles of the Bernadette-Bernhard scale. Two things were lost that day: America's innocence, and the confidence of the pretty well-endowed Leader of the Free World. It just goes to show you, some birds aren't meant to be caged, their feathers are too bright. But in such a massive cage, who can see a bird anyway? Get it on. Got to get it on. No choice but to get it on. Mandate, get it on.
by griffin_t_a September 25, 2014
Get the Bernadette-Bernhard scale mug.She is an angel. You may not believe that she is real at first sight. She is blonde and she has long rapunzel-like hair. She always says the truth that no one can ever say to you. She is brave and clever. She is not good at making jokes...
by heygirl42 January 30, 2020
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