griffin_t_a's definitions
A person of color who is interchangeable with another person of color. It was coined by comedian Adam Carolla on his podcast "The Adam Carolla Show" on 9/11/12.
Person A: Oh no, I heard Michael Clarke Duncan kicked the bucket. I wonder who they'll get to play Kingpin in "Daredevil 2."
Person B: Well, let's see. Ving Rhames, Terry Crews, hell, even Jim Brown. All good blacksimiles.
Person B: Well, let's see. Ving Rhames, Terry Crews, hell, even Jim Brown. All good blacksimiles.
by griffin_t_a September 17, 2012
Get the blacksimilemug. A strong, alcoholic drink that radio host, Adam Carolla, concocts using leftover red wine, preferably Sledgehammer, and Jeremiah Weed’s 90 Proof Cherry Mash Bourbon. Amounts vary, but usually the addition of the Bourbon is an act of desperation meant to prolong the inebriation and therefore constitutes the majority of the mixed drink.
by griffin_t_a March 2, 2011
Get the mangriamug. A politician, usually of color, who overcame what they claim is an unfair system, mostly through hard work, and now, seeking election/re-election, panders to the underprivileged masses by promising to overthrow said unfair system which, paradoxically, allowed him to rise to power. Coined by Adam Carolla on 11/7/12.
(Slap bass solo accompanied by mouth noises)
INT. JERRY'S APARTMENT - DAY
George: That Obama sure has overcome extreme oppression, adversity, and discrimination to become Leader of the Free World.
Jerry: Well, maybe the fact that a guy from his background has flourished in what so many claim is a rigged system proves it's not so rigged after all.
Elaine: Of course it's still rigged. You don't see a female President.
Jerry: Yeah, well maybe Obama will unrig it for you.
(Kramer enters)
Elaine: Hey Kramer, what do you think? Is Obama an unrigger?
Kramer: (pauses) Look, I just came to borrow some milk.
(Slap Bass Outro)
INT. JERRY'S APARTMENT - DAY
George: That Obama sure has overcome extreme oppression, adversity, and discrimination to become Leader of the Free World.
Jerry: Well, maybe the fact that a guy from his background has flourished in what so many claim is a rigged system proves it's not so rigged after all.
Elaine: Of course it's still rigged. You don't see a female President.
Jerry: Yeah, well maybe Obama will unrig it for you.
(Kramer enters)
Elaine: Hey Kramer, what do you think? Is Obama an unrigger?
Kramer: (pauses) Look, I just came to borrow some milk.
(Slap Bass Outro)
by griffin_t_a November 8, 2012
Get the unriggermug. A condition where a man reaches the pinnacle of sexual conquest that leaves his penis so insatiable that his only option is a lateral move involving inserting gerbils into his rectum for a thrill. It was coined by Adam Carolla(aided by Alison Rosen) on his podcast, "The Adam Carolla Show" on 9/20/12.
The second that Richard Gere finished blowing his wad in a breathtaking, 27-year-old Cindy Crawford, he had bought himself a one-way ticket to Gerbilville.
by griffin_t_a September 30, 2014
Get the Gerbilvillemug. An alternative to the traditionally celebrated birthday where the basis of celebration is instead derived from the anniversary of one's greatest lifetime achievement. An individual usually begins to celebrate the event after the age of eighteen since that's generally when they start "making their bones." Naturally, the date of celebration can vary, owing to the fact that new achievements can supersede past ones. For this reason, worthdays later in life pay tribute to very impressive achievements and are therefore more meaningful than their birthday counterpart. The term was coined by Adam Carolla on "The Adam and Dr. Drew Show" on June 8, 2013 with inspiration from Matt "The Porcelain Punisher" Fondiler.
Matt: Happy Birthday Aceman! What are you, 50?
Adam: Nope, 49.
Matt: What an achievement.
Adam: Achievement?!! Winning the 2012 Celebrity Toyota Grand Prix and then coming back the following year and winning it in the Pro Category. That's an achievement. Creating a Podcasting Empire. That's an achievement. Inventing my own signature wine cocktail, Mangria, which did over 2 million in sales last year.
Matt: Achie-(interrupted)
Adam: Achievement! You're goddamn right. But nobody celebrates that.
Matt: Well for what's it worth-(interrupted)
Adam: Worth? Eureka, P.P. You clodhopping commode crusher. You've just given me an idea. Let's celebrate days worthy of celebration. We'll call them worthdays.
Matt: I shall go chisel it into the tablets immediately.
Adam: Oh, Matt, one more thing. I approved your raise. Happy... worthday!
Adam: Nope, 49.
Matt: What an achievement.
Adam: Achievement?!! Winning the 2012 Celebrity Toyota Grand Prix and then coming back the following year and winning it in the Pro Category. That's an achievement. Creating a Podcasting Empire. That's an achievement. Inventing my own signature wine cocktail, Mangria, which did over 2 million in sales last year.
Matt: Achie-(interrupted)
Adam: Achievement! You're goddamn right. But nobody celebrates that.
Matt: Well for what's it worth-(interrupted)
Adam: Worth? Eureka, P.P. You clodhopping commode crusher. You've just given me an idea. Let's celebrate days worthy of celebration. We'll call them worthdays.
Matt: I shall go chisel it into the tablets immediately.
Adam: Oh, Matt, one more thing. I approved your raise. Happy... worthday!
by griffin_t_a May 21, 2014
Get the worthdaymug. The member of a hispanic family whose wages supply its livelihood. Coined by Adam Carolla on "The Adam Carolla Show" on September 1, 2015.
Jose: Mujer! Donde esta mi cerveza?
Consuela: Que?
Jose: My beer, woman! Didn't you go to the supermercado?
Consuela: Si, si.
Jose: So you bought my Corona?
Consuela: No...no.
Jose: Dammit woman, I bust my chepa down at the plant everyday to put food on this table. And all I ask is for something to wash it down with, maybe get a little borracho while watching ESPN Deportes. Is that too much to ask?
Consuela: No...no. Tu eres el "breadwinner."
Jose: Dammit woma- Oh, you agree with me. Though we're not really much of a "bread" family but point taken. (looks in fridge) Well, at least you got tortillas. I guess that makes me a (chuckles) tortillawinner.
Consuela: No...No. That's incredibly racist.
Consuela: Que?
Jose: My beer, woman! Didn't you go to the supermercado?
Consuela: Si, si.
Jose: So you bought my Corona?
Consuela: No...no.
Jose: Dammit woman, I bust my chepa down at the plant everyday to put food on this table. And all I ask is for something to wash it down with, maybe get a little borracho while watching ESPN Deportes. Is that too much to ask?
Consuela: No...no. Tu eres el "breadwinner."
Jose: Dammit woma- Oh, you agree with me. Though we're not really much of a "bread" family but point taken. (looks in fridge) Well, at least you got tortillas. I guess that makes me a (chuckles) tortillawinner.
Consuela: No...No. That's incredibly racist.
by griffin_t_a October 20, 2015
Get the tortillawinnermug. The time period when a dereliction of duty occurs. Often, an ordinarily prudent member of an organization who normally exercises the level of care generally required for their position, will request that a window of negligence be granted by their superior due to time constraints or logistical complications. The partaker, in essence, is asking for a limited-time exemption from their expected responsibilities or in some cases, after dereliction has already occurred, leniency from their superior in regards to punishment for said subpar job performance that would’ve taken place within the window. The phrase was coined by Matt Fondiler on the 4/19/16 episode of “The Adam Carolla Show.”
INT. BRIDGE OF TITANIC – APRIL 14, 1912 02:40 GMT
(Captain rushes onto the bridge)
Captain: What was that scraping sound I heard while I was in the bathroom?
First mate: Sir, I think we hit an iceberg.
Captain: You think?! Weren’t you at the helm?
First mate: Er…uh…
Captain: Well weren’t you?!!
Second mate: I know where he was Captain.
First mate: You fink!!
Second mate: I may be a fink but at least I’m not some sexual deviant who gets his rocks off watching scrawny, working-class lads plow Rubenesque socialites in the backs of Renault CB Coupe de Villes down in the cargo hold.
First mate: I was merely protecting our passengers’ property.
Second mate: Yeah, then why was your dick in your hand?
Captain: Enough!! This is clearly my fault.
First mate: Now now, Captain.
Captain: No, I should’ve given you a smaller window of negligence while I dropped the Cosby kids off at the pool.
First mate: Cosby?
Captain: He’s a negro rapist in the future who played a beloved pussy doctor on telev---Nevermind that. Ready the lifeboats!
(Captain rushes onto the bridge)
Captain: What was that scraping sound I heard while I was in the bathroom?
First mate: Sir, I think we hit an iceberg.
Captain: You think?! Weren’t you at the helm?
First mate: Er…uh…
Captain: Well weren’t you?!!
Second mate: I know where he was Captain.
First mate: You fink!!
Second mate: I may be a fink but at least I’m not some sexual deviant who gets his rocks off watching scrawny, working-class lads plow Rubenesque socialites in the backs of Renault CB Coupe de Villes down in the cargo hold.
First mate: I was merely protecting our passengers’ property.
Second mate: Yeah, then why was your dick in your hand?
Captain: Enough!! This is clearly my fault.
First mate: Now now, Captain.
Captain: No, I should’ve given you a smaller window of negligence while I dropped the Cosby kids off at the pool.
First mate: Cosby?
Captain: He’s a negro rapist in the future who played a beloved pussy doctor on telev---Nevermind that. Ready the lifeboats!
by griffin_t_a September 23, 2016
Get the Window of negligencemug.