hedge fund

Not to be confused with grass money, this term refers to a separate financial account that a homeowner maintains to cover the costs of products/services to keep his shrubbery tidy and healthy.

Burglars tend to target properties with tall/dense shrubbery that they can crouch behind and hide, so you should always keep a healthy hedge fund to ensure that your bushes stay trimmed and transparent.

by QuacksO May 7, 2018

hedge apples

Super tiny balls; a small scrotum.

Our left back has the smallest hedge apples on the pitch.

by MeltdMushroom October 6, 2019

ozempic hedge

when you date or attempt to date a high calorie individual (typically a girl) because you see the potential if they lost weight

i would lowkey hit becky
hell nah, her bmi is room temp
ozempic hedge bro

by iridocyclitis_penjamin July 23, 2024

lady hedge

Pubic hair as an alternative to lady garden

Christ your lady hedge needs a trim its blocking the old jade gate!

by Major Noshheroff October 14, 2019

happiness hedge

When a fan places a wager against their favorite team in a game or other event. This causes a win/win situation for the fan. Either the fan’s favorite team wins or the fan win their bet.

James: I bet on the Nuggets to lose.

Jake: but aren’t you a fan of the Nuggets?

James: yes, but if they lose, I want to at least get paid.

Jake: ahh, the old happiness hedge

Kyle: true dat

by cupofjuice93 May 23, 2023

Over the Hedge

The failure of hedging results in completion.

"My hedge sesh went too far last night and I went over the hedge"

by jelkinboy584 February 24, 2022

Trimming hedges

Sticking your finger in a girls ass while rubbing her shaved area

Do you like trimming hedges? Fuck ya

by Delicious637382 August 7, 2016