Functioning alcoholic 

When one can be drunk every night and still be completely function able the next day

Nate went out every night this week and got totally shit faced. He still got to work the next morning at 8... He's a functioning alcoholic

Functioning alcoholic by Tater tot 5190 June 30, 2014

Functioning Retard 

One who is medically diagnosed as "Mentally Retarded" but manages to function at a normal level. While managing at a normal level that said person does things that would make other believe that he is a dumb-ass, dimwhit, or plaind old retard. See George W. Bush

Everything George W. Bush said during his speeches.

Some functioning retards managed to make their way to the top, president Bush did.

Functioning Retard by CoUnMe April 21, 2010

functioning addict 

A person that has an addiction whether it be to alcohol or drugs and still able to maintain a "normal" life.

My boyfriend is a functioning addict. He can drink from the time he wakes up until the time he goes to bed and still is able to go to work.

functioning addict by I Can Be Your Cutie April 12, 2008

functionally-retarded

Adjective describing a person(s) who has just enough brain cells to survive; devoid of common sense and mental aptitude.

Dave is such a tool. I bet he can't even wipe his own ass. He's functionally-retarded.

People suck. Most of the general public is functionally-retarded.

functionally-retarded by Brett319 June 17, 2008

Functional alcoholic 

Someone who can maintain an orderly, outward social appearance while their personal life has devolved into complete chaos due to over-drinking. Their friends and family are often impressed with their achievements, while the alcoholic knows that their drinking has lead to a full-blown loss of control and that it is just a matter of time until their behavior blows up in their face. In a bad way.

Emelio's friends/family: " Emelio is about to graduate med school. We are so proud. We only wish we could accomplish as much".

Emelio: "I am a functional alcoholic. Everyone I know thinks I'm doing great but in reality my brain has turned to slush. I can't believe I BS'd my way through med school and got a 3.8 GP because I don't remember any of it. I can't believe I'm almost 30 and have somehow avoided getting a DUI thus far. Everyone thinks I'm so great, but in reality, I'm totally fucking dangerous but I just haven't been caught yet. It's all catching up with me though. It's only a matter of time until I do something really stupid and everyone will realize what a fuck-up I truly am.

Functional alcoholic by ???s upon ???s September 1, 2016

Functionally High 

When a person smokes enough marijuana to feel its effects, but not enough to alter competence at regular daily tasks or create a lasting low after the effects have worn off.

Becoming functionally high is a skill that comes naturally for some, and for others takes a long time to develop and master.

Person 1: I just got some killer bud from a friend of mine. Wanna smoke?

Person 2: Ok, but I have work in an hour. I guess I'll go in functionally high.

Functionally High by DJAlexxander September 8, 2011

high functioning psychopath 

A psychopath who has a stable lifestyle and usually possess high status and influence in society. They can be anyone- CEOs, millionaires, politicians , doctors. But inspit of their high functioning they are still people without a shred of empathy or a conscience

James Bond is a high functioning psychopath.

high functioning psychopath by Default_User October 20, 2015