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Closet Smut

n. Smut that lives in your closet. Often a super attractive whore who comes out only when she is called upon for a good sex.
A. "Dude I could really use a blow job"
B. "Just hit up my Closet Smut"

A." I got my fuck on for like 3 hours last night"
B. " Really? Was she hot?"
A." nah, just some closet smut
by KyleHall15 January 13, 2011
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closeified

Weston, Sam, and Aimee closeified the night they thought they were going to die.
by WeSaCam October 2, 2010
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closted

when typing with your eyes closed, upside down and under water you tend to write closed as "closted"
i can type with my eyes closted, upside down and under water!!!
by random name 16 November 2, 2010
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closet hog

A fat person who claims they have medical problems preventing them from being a normal weight when they really just stuff their face.
Barbara has always been very overweight and she always claimed she was on a strict health-food diet plan, but one night I saw her at a buffet with a plate overflowing with hotdogs, sandwiches, fries, chocolate cake, and the list goes on. She's a closet hog.
by deepspace10 November 30, 2010
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Closet-Kink

The act of being kinky only when no one else is around.
Jessica Alba was a Closet-Kink because she kept her handcuffs in a lockbox under her bed.
by Grizzly Gaddis March 10, 2011
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closet juggalette

a juggalette who is quiet about being a juggalette. these girls are still true to their family and always has their backs. Based on all their personality and how they act with friends. You'll never truly know if they are until they tell you.
That girl is such a closet juggalette, after talking to her about her views on things.
by Holly Matkoroni May 10, 2011
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Close The Hand

An escalation of a state of Domestic Violence, whereby the "open hand" of a slap is exchanged for the "closed hand" of a fist.
"So what happened?"
"She went crazy and slapped me!"
"Oh man, that's terrible!"
"And the look in her eye; Dude, I thought she was gonna Close The Hand..."
by PopeMichael May 11, 2011
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