Hate wank

To punish one’s self for poor performance you masturbate using deep heat as lube.

Johnny lost another client today, he went home to punish himself with a hate wank.

by This_guy0885 November 2, 2023

pride wank

To masturbate over the proudness of oneself (rather than a sexual fantasy).

I'm so proud of myself for getting this promotion. I'm going to have a great pride wank tonight.

by X7000 September 12, 2017

woke-wank

A gesture, speech or outburst from a highly motivated member of the elitist wokerati.

Here we go again, lefties having a woke-wank.
I will not be woke-wanked on this one!

by garethc January 27, 2023

consolation wank

Masturbation that occurs after one has attempted and failed to have sex with someone. May be called a "consolation fap" by someone born after 1990.

We went back to her place and I thought this was the night, but she said she wasn't ready so I settled for a consolation wank after she fell asleep.

by ghostofshoegazer February 12, 2014

Lover Wank

When your having a wank, just before you blow the load, shout out your girlfriend/boyfriend then try and finish the job before they get into your room, if not they can finish you off.

Wow Ted failed to finish his wank so his girl gave him a lover wank!

by John.E June 21, 2015

Posh wank

Chiefly in British English: Masturbating with a condom on.

She flaked last minute so I ended up having a posh wank instead.

by Ksuave March 7, 2020

Wank Sock

Also known as "The Love Sock". The old sock that you use to ejaculate into when masturbating and thrown under the bed.

"Shit, i've been busted. My mum found my wank sock under the bed last night!"

by Arse face August 13, 2017