The most Mondo of all Dongs. A long Schlong is something utterly remarkable.

A 20 foot dildo.
*in bed*
Her: You have such a long Schlong!
Him: *penis grows to 20 feet*
by LONGERSCHLONG October 28, 2018
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If, while eating a long john, the filling shoots out the end, the long john becomes a schlong john. Can also be used for particularly long and skinny and/or phallic long johns.
Whoa! Watch where you point that schlong john.
by SamAdams February 1, 2005
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A penis belonging to a dude that no matter how many chicks he bangs he never gets a STD!
That dude has banged so many chicks and not even a drip! He must have a Teflon schlong!!
by rwalk June 23, 2016
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to slap a girl in the face with your schlong.
Jack gave Jill a black eye when he schlong-schlapped her last nite.
by Chris Scholten February 8, 2007
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Sean Connery's personal nickname for his legendary penis.
Sean Connery: Shrpead em' wide sho that that ole' Schlong Connery can shqueeze his way in.
by Dutch Boy July 14, 2012
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Condom usually magnum used to fit a larger penis. Can also be called a schlong-sleeve shirt.
Greg put on his schlong-sleeve so he could take care of Rebecca.
by Charlie T. May 18, 2010
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The act of abstaining from sexual relations prior to marriage phrased in a blunt and oftentimes over-zealous tone.
I want to keep dating Jane, but every time I bring up doing the hankey pankey she keeps giving me The Cold Schlong.
by KillerBill November 4, 2021
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