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Politician

Also known as a professional liar, a politician is a person who makes their career off of constantly lying, cheating, blackmailing and intimidating their way to the top. A politician is a master at convincing others to fall for whatever lies they might tell them, even if they're insanely obvious just by looking at them.

Politicians are also comparable to a mafia crime boss, as many of the higher up politicians have the police in their back pocket, and they're not afraid to sic their associates on someone they don't like when they have something to say that could threaten their spot.

Politicians throughout history have also committed acts that would have seen normal people get thrown in prison, such as ordering assassinations (Lyndon Johnson), rigging elections (Donald Trump), sexually assaulting women (Brett Kavanaugh), and stealing (Richard Nixon).

If you ever see a politician on TV doing a speech, giving an interview, running a campaign ad, or anything else, it's in your best interest that you don't trust any of them
Only a fool would trust a politician
by Metallicajunkie October 5, 2018
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politicians casket

vertical casket takes up less space
new vertical politicians casket solves the problem,
Because most politicians are so crooked you can just screw them into the ground when they die.
by itichie_nocanpo October 3, 2006
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politiclone

A political pundit or commentator who is unable to think for her/himself.
Fox News uses the opinions of politiclones to bolster support for the Bush Administration.
by Jeff Lyons September 15, 2008
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politidiot

An individual that always find a way to inject politics into any discussion.

politidiots (plural)
Mary: "Looks like we're in for beach weather tomorrow."

John: "That's because that moron Dubya allowed drilling in ANWR!"

Mary: "You're such a fucking politidiot, John!"
by 12-Banger July 28, 2009
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Closet Politician

Anyone who has political views and or opinions, but are too afraid to say what they think to remain neutral and avoid confrontation.
CNN Reporter: "What are your views on the Wall?"
Closet Politician: *Oh no, what should I say?* * If I tell CNN what I truly think, they will twist my words and I'll somehow end up on Top 10 worst criminals in the world.*
CNN Reporter: "Sir?"
Closet Politician: "Give me one second, I'm still thinking."
CNN Reporter: "It shouldn't be that difficult, it's not like I'm asking you to do a backflip?"
Closet Politician: "Did you just ask me to do a backflip?"
CNN Reporter: *Before reporter can get a word out*
Closet Politician: *Does backflip*

CNN Reporter: *Sighs and walks off, talking aloud to himself* " How are we going to make fake news if everyone is too afraid to tell us their political views, that is the fifteenth backflip someone has done today."
by Mr.TrollNDaNTaNet January 31, 2019
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politicious

Normally used to describe low life politicians or people who use politics to get their own way, twist the truth or make themselves seem more important than they are.
Gordon Brown is a right politicious bastard.
by Lucifus October 18, 2008
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