Pet The Unicorn

Another way of saying your masterbating (Jacking off)

I'm gonna "pet the unicorn" before i go to jessica's house.

by AndieAnderson May 12, 2016

face pet

Generally - the natural occurrence of facial hair, also known as a beard, which tends to grow on a man's face, if he chooses not to shave for an extended period of time.
Specifically - Jake Gyllenhaal's beard.

Etymology:

The term face pet was first coined by "lemniscate", on September 29th 2010, when posting on the popular Jake Gyllenhaal fan blog called Wet Dark And Wild.
The word combination face pet was engendered in reference to:
1) the tendency men have to subconsciously stroke and touch their face and/or facial hair; often a form of auto-erotic touching when flirting to indicate they're interested
2) the health benefits discovered by researchers at the University of Warwick with regards to stroking or playing with one's pet

Jake gently strokes his face pet whilst staring into the distance, lost in a wistful gaze.

by Razzmatazz101 March 1, 2012

Pet Iguana

Slang for an abnormally long penis, usually over 8 inches in its flaccid state, over 12 inches in its erect state.

Girl, yesterday this fool showed me his pet iguana in the bathroom!!

by Prazzo July 16, 2009

parents pet

a parents pet is a boy/girl that does everything the parents want and will do anything for them to like her/him, the parents pet will cry when an older sibling even just touches them so they can be the parents favorite.

Boy/Girl : ow! *crying*

older sibling : I barely even touched her.

Mom/Dad : Yeah right, don't hit your sister/brother again. * carries him/her out*

a parents pet is a boy/girl that does everything the parents want and will do anything for them to like her/him, the parents pet will cry when an older sibling even just touches them so they can be the parents favorite

Boy/Girl : ow! *crying*

older sibling : I barely even touched her.

Mom/Dad : Yeah right, don't hit your sister/brother again. * carries him/her out*

by mynameiskipper November 26, 2016

Life's Pet

One whose life is virtually perfect, it is as if the person is friends with life and brings life up when it's feeling down so in exchange life will treat the person well.

Damn, look at Bill over there with his new convertible he got by using money he got from a raise at his already-high-paying job. it is as if he is a Life's Pet.

by BLesSTheHuman March 23, 2013

forum pets

A discord server where people who are tired of "Forum Sweats" go to.
Mostly filled with furries

"Man, forum sweats is cool but I wanna leave and take a break and rejoin!"
"Then join Forum Pets!"

by Ked_moment January 26, 2021

Hard Pet

The act of petting a friend, loved one or random stranger on the shoulder region repeatedly with an unnecessary amount of force.

Ralph won the tennis tournament so I gave him a super hard pet as a congratulatory measure, promptly causing his fist to make contact with my face.

by Fatty Bunter September 3, 2010