academic masturbation

The practice in which professors and teachers find new ways to talk about hypothetical and unpractical solutions to nonexistent problems or scenarios. Simultaneous waste of taxpayer money may or may not be present depending on the type of institution.

This new class is a huge waste of time; the professor loves academic masturbation, but hasn't actually taught us anything useful.

by bob seeply December 13, 2016

Academic Orgasm

When you find an article that is peer-reviewed and supports all of your claims. Like striking oil, but in an academic way that is also sexy.

"I just had the most phenomenal academic orgasm. I need to go wipe up and tell my supervisor about it."

by bepmonkey100 March 18, 2019

academic journal

Noun. A periodic publication, usually online and in print, that publishes peer-reviewed research in a particular field of study.

Nature is an academic journal.

Academic journals are excellent sources of information; they are usually more reliable than the news media and Facebook posts.

by pickettbd June 25, 2019

academic review article

Noun. A useful consolidation of material scattered across various sources. Arguably, this definition could also be applied to a vacuum cleaner.

This academic journal publishes academic review articles on subjects related to the field.

by pickettbd June 25, 2019

Academic Retard

A Person who cheats on a test, and fails anyway.

Anthony copied Leslie on the final. they both Failed. What an Academic Retard! He probably would've done better guessing on the multiple choice.

by King Farquaad May 18, 2021

academic wanker

An individual complicating matters just to jack off that they know terminology/ books/academic papers.

Academic wanker: "I am looking to affect my footprint negatively from this application."

Non-wanker: "you're going to use the app less?"

by Yippewhooptywoo November 30, 2022

Academic Pick me

A person that doesn’t put in any effort at school or work and then complains when they are failing.

Jason: why am I failing English?
Katie: you haven’t read the book and you haven’t even started the paper that’s due tomorrow.
Jason: but I don’t understand why I’m failing!
Katie: It’s because your an Academic Pick me!

by Virum69.99 February 2, 2023