Breakfast Machine (noun, slang)
Definition:
A wildly over-complicated, theatrical explanation meant to distract from a simple lie, mistake, or inconvenient truth. Often full of unnecessary details, emotional sidetracks, and implausible logic, it’s used when someone could’ve just said, “I messed up,” but instead built a three-act play with puppets and smoke machines.
Definition:
A wildly over-complicated, theatrical explanation meant to distract from a simple lie, mistake, or inconvenient truth. Often full of unnecessary details, emotional sidetracks, and implausible logic, it’s used when someone could’ve just said, “I messed up,” but instead built a three-act play with puppets and smoke machines.
1.
“Spare me the breakfast machine and just tell me you were with your ex.”
2.
“That whole story was a damn breakfast machine. I stopped believing it at step four when the dog allegedly called 911.”
3.
“She couldn’t just say she was late—she gave me a breakfast machine involving a flat tire, a sick aunt, and Mercury in retrograde.”
“Spare me the breakfast machine and just tell me you were with your ex.”
2.
“That whole story was a damn breakfast machine. I stopped believing it at step four when the dog allegedly called 911.”
3.
“She couldn’t just say she was late—she gave me a breakfast machine involving a flat tire, a sick aunt, and Mercury in retrograde.”
by Angee Maree May 29, 2025
Get the Breakfast Machinemug. A breakfast consisting of cannabinoids. A taste of tetrahydrocannabinol to get you going in the morning.
by d3qu December 30, 2016
Get the pot breakfastmug. by Billlio January 21, 2017
Get the breakfast of championsmug. PLS I'M BRAZILIAN AND I DON'T EAT SHIT FOR BREAKFAST 🤢THATS DISGUSTING WTF!!! I EAT BREAD, CEREAL BUT NOT SHIT!!! ANYTHING BUT SHIT 😭
by seggsynexono February 24, 2024
Get the Brazillian Breakfastmug. When a girl on a farm (or in any Southern State) eats eggs for breakfast, and afterward starts sucking a guy's dick & she pukes the eggs on his dick... but like a Champ she keeps going, and swallows the eggs again while continuing to suck his dick.
by Gusthe3rd July 11, 2018
Get the ranchero breakfastmug. Hey Rand, instead of getting Mrs. Butterworth Thick n' Rich® I decided to save some money and get this new Great Value Brand™!
Well Nance you cant just shit in a waffle iron and call it breakfast.
Well Nance you cant just shit in a waffle iron and call it breakfast.
by Pork de la chop October 19, 2017
Get the Shit in a Waffle Iron and Call it Breakfastmug. When your Morning Fart produces an odour so foul your partner has no option but to vacate the bed & thus make the Breakfast.
My wife said this morning for fuck sake that stinks shall I'm going to make breakfasr. The Breakfast Maker works
by Hedley7368 November 18, 2017
Get the Breakfast Makermug.