office unicorn

That girl at work who is beyond everyone you have ever met's standards because she is both ridiculously attractive and also really really nice to everyone to the point it drives you all insane. Almost always has a boyfriend who is almost always a total dick.

Max: fuck holly looks incredible today
Me: yeah she's definitely the office unicorn

by lachyisded3 July 22, 2017

office smudge

The person in the office who turns the simplest tasks into a painstakingly process.

Please don't give that task to Billy. He's the office smudge and will make everyone's life miserable.

by Tortuga12 August 21, 2017

office twat

The one person who among the rest really goes that extra mile to being bossy, and most of all, ALWAYS thinks they’re right and their way is always the best.

Omg Julie you’re such an office twat, no one thinks you’re always right.

by Lollipopxxx October 20, 2017

office fridge

Demon hellscape on Earth filled with rotten fish and hummus that some poor unfortunate soul has to clean annually. Or it just rots and becomes sentient.

Travis left his fucking fishdick sandwich in the office fridge and now it's grown legs and is self-aware.

by Emmie The Spiteful January 2, 2018

office pump

Usually referred to as the female at the office that has any type of sex with any new employee or anyone else. Can be utilized as a school pump, station pump or gym pump.

Eric: Hey Bill, what do you think of that new girl Megan?
Bill: Steer clear of her, she’s the office pump. Everyone has already fucked her.

by Brave Dave C January 14, 2018

officer cockblock

primarily somebody who prevents you from displaying Public Displays of Affection or engaging in sexual contact with another person.

Example 1) At school- the volunteer parents or staff who go around the campus making sure couples do not have intimacy moments

Example 2) In public- somebody who tells you and the other person to go make out somewhere else or “get a room!”

> be me
> be the parent volunteer who walks around school making sure people are decently behaving
> suddenly see 2 young lovers holding hands in the lunch line
>to prevent any further indecent behavior I yell “Hey you two, too much skin-to-skin contact!”
> the rebellious male Teenager yells at me “fuck off, officer cockblock!

> I get my taser gun and shock the living shit out of the little prick

by Thot$layer539 January 15, 2018

officate

To be in charge/control of a very special something.

She is going to officate the basktball game.

by PussyIsGood May 7, 2018