Dirty baptism

When you ejaculate on her fore-head in a praying position

“Gave her the ol’ dirty baptism last night”

by pizza dummy April 30, 2024

Jewish baptism

The act of oral being performed on a Jewish girl from a Catholic boy to the point she squirts all over him

So I met this guy, a Catholic boy from Brooklyn. He went down on me so well that I ended up giving him a Jewish baptism.

by NJG420 May 4, 2024

chicago baptism

Walking in the door and getting hit in the head with a fairly large dildo.

I loved Ebon’s story of his Chicago Baptism, as told on Late Night with Seth Meyers on June 19th 2024.

by ms2023 June 20, 2024

Chicago Baptism

To accidentally sit in a seat, wet with SOMETHING, on the CTA. Do it once, and you’ll never do it again.

There was one seat open on the red line, and before anyone could warn me, I got my Chicago Baptism.

by Chicago Zym June 26, 2024

Williams Baptist University

Williams Baptist University is a four-year college in Walnut Ridge Arkansas. Also known as WBU, is often referred to as the Harvard of Walnut Ridge. The dining hall’s "Weekend Pasta" and "Chicken Surprise" have been surprising people for years. The dorm rooms? Quaintly prison-sized. The Wi-Fi? Almost good enough to load Netflix if you squint hard enough. The whole place runs on Jesus, chicken strips, and sheer denial about having real-world responsibilities. Parties? More like board games and an 8:30 bedtime. Wi-Fi’s so slow it practically sends emails by carrier pigeon, and “wild night” means a trip to Walmart (if you can find a ride). Want to go out? Good luck—“out” is the gas station ten minutes away. The town closes at sunset, and if you thought Greek life meant wild parties, here it just means Bible study groups named after the alphabet. By senior year, you’ll know everyone on campus, including that random campus squirrel you’ve named Frank. Welcome to WBU—where your social life is as quiet as the library on a Sunday morning!

I regretted going to Williams Baptist University

by Makbrody November 3, 2024

Bird Baptism

You fucked something questionable Saturday night, so you get to church early Sunday morning and dip your bird in the Baptism bowl.

I think Stacy had the clap, so I did a Bird Baptism the next day.

by EmilyReiser February 23, 2026

Apple Bapples

a more sophisticated term for the American restaurant chain “Applebee’s”. only to be used in passing by the nerdiest, best of folk.

“i’m at apple bapples”

by muddyhobbit May 22, 2025