shit on my dick

this is a phrase of astonishment, the statement is so ridiculous that it must mean bewilderment
by leefvc April 02, 2009
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Dick, Shit Tampon

When your girl is on her period you can use the "Dick Shit Tampon" as an alternative to costly pads and stuff. Make sure you have a lot of fiber in your diet because firm shits work best. First, you fuck her for a little bit to get her pussy opened up and the juices flowing (if your dick is smaller than your shit you may choose to use a dildo to begin the lubrication and widening process). You can then cum in her for good measure (optional, but highly recommended). After this, you proceed to line up your asshole with her gaping cunt and slowly ease in your "Shit Tampon". This will save you the outrageous cost of stupid feminine products and the embarrassment of walking through the store with them. If you are eating regularly, you can replace the tampons often which is good for hygiene. It is recommended that you change the tampon daily, or every other day if she's being a bitch about it.
Your Lady: "Honey, will you go to the store and get me some tampons?"

You: "Come on, bitch, I'm not going to the store. Relax and I'll give you a 'Dick, Shit Tampon'."

Your Lady: "Great idea! You know, 'Dick, Shit Tampons' are more absorbent than other leading brand tampons."
by Chommer Commanche April 05, 2009
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burnt dick shit

When you fuck a chick in the ass without lube so fast that your dick gets burnt.
Damn bro that bitch gave me burnt dick shit bro fuck that shit man fuck
by Jonshoeshack March 27, 2023
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jackrabbit dick shit

jackrabbit dick shit is usally a term you would call a friend when he does some dumb ass shit right after you told him what to do or gave his dumb ass directions.

-Brandon Anderson
Nigga i just told you the storm was coming now look at you jackrabbit dick shit your dead.
by @polodowndon September 24, 2020
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dumb dick shit

Purposely preforming a task that is negligible to equipment, morale or that generally makes things worse for everyone else. The task can be utterly ridiculous or obscenely absurd.
Co-worker 1; what happened to the new chainsaw? It barely runs and is as sharp as a bowling ball.

Co-worker 2; Cody had it yesterday, probably burying it into the ground or doing some other dumb dick shit with it.
by KingCoffee April 27, 2019
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Shit on my Dick

A common expression shouted when a serious offense has occured, such as looking down after a long session of butt sex, to find shit on your dick, or finding that your roomate ate all the skittles.
Guy 1"Where the fuck are my skittles?"

Guy 2"Whats that, on your erect penis?'

Guy 1"Shit on my Dick!"
by StanofCourse September 23, 2011
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