porch monkey

A person who sits on the porch and watches the neighbors.

A small child that enjoys being on the porch.

And what can I get for you, little porch monkey? Oh its okay, I'm taking it back.

by Randall G June 11, 2006

not the brightest bulb on the porch

a nice way of refering to a person who is not smart or who does things that are ill-advised

See also: not the sharpest tool in the shed, a few bricks shy of a load, not playing with a full deck

Durwood: My uncle is not the brightest bulb on the porch.

Winthrop: Why do you say that?

Durwood: He saw a sign that said 'keep of the grass'... so flushed his stash o' hash down the drain.

Winthrop: Bloody 'ell!

by Hey-Johnny-Johnny June 11, 2006

Porch Cramp

A painful spasm/cramp of the asshole that can cause you to jump up from the chair on your porch.

Riley jumped up from his chair spewing expletives, his butt cheeks clenching as a rather painful porch cramp affected his asshole.

by T Bubala November 28, 2011

The Porch Life

The Porch Life is the place you can just go and kick it and not worry about anything else. We sit around and chill all day. Ganja is our medicine and escape. We are the kids your parents warned you about. When we arrive, you know the party has started. Haters wish they could be us, and we just laugh at them. We will all be successful one day and there's nothing you can do to stop us. We have fun and still make better grades than you. (With the exception of one) Porch Life til the next life.
P.S. Not everyone is welcome at the porch.

I'm living The Porch Life, and you are jealous.

Ill be at the Porch.

by PLFL December 6, 2011

reverse porch pirate

The act of going directly to someone's place of residence and leaving them a package, rather than sending it through the mail. The contents can be anything from a glitter bomb to a legitimate gift.

I'm bored and that prick who stole my lunch last week isn't home, so I'm gonna reverse porch pirate him with my cat's used litter.

by blue_heart February 14, 2023

Hosing off the back porch

tucking your penis back, goat style, then peeing behind you

He was really hosing off the back porch with his dick

by Huser February 3, 2007

Parah Salin

V. - To parasail on the political engine in the carefree, thoughtfree, moralfree way that Sarah Palin did, until here untimely crash and death. To use renewable wind energy to puff oneself up with hot air and leave solid ground, in pursuit of unreachable sunsets and clouds, ignoring all rains and waves, and criticisms.

Not to be confused with Sarahfailing or Sarahfalin.

"Yo mahn, wehr u behn?"
"I wehnt to dah hehrtlahnd mahn, wehnt parah salin in da carrihbeeahn."
"I dohnt see ahnee bohdeelee ihnjuhrees thoh mahn..."
"Noh, I meen pohlihtihcahlee, I wahs ahrehstehd fo' sohlihsitin' prahsihtuhshun."

by G.M.H. November 5, 2009