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Rappin' for Jesus

A popular song made by Pastor Jim Colerick and Mary Sue Colerick who most likely fucks the people in his church but Well I wrote this song for the Christian youth
I wanna teach kids the Christian truth
If you wanna reach those kids on the street
Then you gotta do a rap to a hip-hop beat
I gave my sermon an urban kick
My rhymes are fly, my beats are sick
My crew is big and it keeps getting bigger
That's cause Jesus Christ is my nigga
Oooooooo
He's a life-changer, miracle-arranger
Born to the virgin mom in a manger
Water to wine, he's a drink exchanger
And he died for your sins
I preach the word, that's my gig
And I rhyme better than Notorious BIG
Other emcees, I wish them well
But if you live in sin, you burn in hell
Now I'ma pass the mic to my lovely wife
She's a fly emcee and the light of my life
So to bust a rhyme without further ado
Take it away, Mary Sue!
Jesus Christ is my nigga
I am officially a Rappin' for Jesus Christian
by Go ring the durbell September 30, 2020
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Jesus guest

n. (Gee^ zuz gest) An arrogant person who thinks that budget motels should have Marriott or Hilton standards in accordance to amenities. Also has a high demand for decaffeinated coffee.
Darla the Jesus guest demanded the lobby serve decaf coffee during her free continental breakfast.
by lordvader1982 November 18, 2010
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jesus sauce

when jesus was around he'd masturbate into cups and make people drink his seamen b/c if they drank this jesus sauce, they believed they'd gain his powers.
"my great-great-great-great-great-great (x's 45) grandfather jimmy drank jesus sauce once a day and learned how to walk on water!!!"
by Gjelstiznles July 31, 2006
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Jesus Christ

Main character in the best selling fiction book of all time. Don't bother reading it though, he dies in the end.
I'm so bummed that Jesus Christ got killed off in the end of the Bible! But hey, they could totally make a killer zombie movie from his resurrection.
by skifreemt February 25, 2010
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V-Jesus

V-Jesus is when a car powered by a Honda Engine with VTEC hits 6,000rpm's and then continues to exceed passed the magical stock redline embracing hitting 9,000rpm's releasing Jesus from your engine. Once released, Jesus cast a light of enlightenment showing you have hit V-Jesus and that it is now time to shift.
Did you see that flare, John hit V-Jesus!
by batmang January 24, 2005
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Jesus freak

someone evincing 2 or more of the following symptoms:
1: proclaims the lord is coming with the imminent end of the world
2: has signs on their person, car, or home with bible quotes
3: goes to church more than once a week
4: started their own christian offshoot cult because the rest aren;t pious enough
5: tries to foist an extreme form of christianity off on others
6: is a born-again christian and/or fundamentalist
every time i see that jesus freak walking around with his "god will save, the end is near" sign, i want to convert to satanism just so i can sacrifice him.
by minghi May 21, 2003
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Jesus Phone

The iphone by apple. A phone that makes you feel like Jesus. In fact Jesus probably has one himself.
Rick: HOLY SHIT I GOT A JESUS PHONE!!!
by Burkus December 19, 2008
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