The worst of the fucking worst. Your average dickhead is just a wanker, but when you pull out "Wank Pheasant", it's pretty much the worst thing you can say to a man, the male equivalent of calling a woman a cunt, basically. A man who should have his oxygen privileges revoked.
by AC Sativa December 03, 2016
by Pete January 30, 2005
A ritual performed when an individual has succeeded at something. Consists of a lengthy session of masturbation.
by Glorywankerman August 19, 2009
usually involves coming home alone after a heavy night drinking and masturbating over a good looking guy you added to the wank bank while out drinking and then mid-wank losing feeling in your legs and trundling over the coffee table, face first into french window, cock in hand with Chinese take away everywhere!
by drunk wanker November 03, 2011
A nasty wank is one in which the man is sneakily pleasuring himself, perhaps in a public toilet, in the car, or in a friends bedroom while they are out. The sneaky wank works well until it goes wrong, either because the man has not provided enough space to come, or is not prepared for it when it happens.
The result is usually a very wet t-shirt or other item of clothing, which will be embarrassingly obvious. The sneaky wank can also be preformed lying down, and may result in come running down the leg and becoming entwined in hair. This is almost impossible to clean up, especially in a hurry. The situation is exacerbated if a friend or relative is about to walk in or actually does.
Can lead to embarrassing situations for all involved.
The result is usually a very wet t-shirt or other item of clothing, which will be embarrassingly obvious. The sneaky wank can also be preformed lying down, and may result in come running down the leg and becoming entwined in hair. This is almost impossible to clean up, especially in a hurry. The situation is exacerbated if a friend or relative is about to walk in or actually does.
Can lead to embarrassing situations for all involved.
Person 1: Why is there wet all over you and my bed? Were you having a nasty wank?
Person 2: Eh...no...though I would appreciate if you left the room again.
Person 1: You're sick.
Person 2: Eh...no...though I would appreciate if you left the room again.
Person 1: You're sick.
by NobJockey69 January 15, 2012
This is when you jack off to the thought or image of old TV stars, maybe from when you were a teenager and porn was in short supply.
"I was watching Charlies Angels on cable last night and treated myself to some great retro-wanking."
by Wizards Sleeve February 12, 2007