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The lonely masterbater

When your irrational fan base immediately masturbate when they hear your name. Even after your failed career.
Chad heard the name Jimmer in the produce section, now those apples have a protein glaze and he is know as "the lonely masterbater."
by Bman88 April 8, 2019
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Castrate

Any female that has to castrate or a cut a guys dick off is like a guy who has to cut a female's tits off (to win a genocidal war). Cutting a guy's dick off while he's sleeping is especially chicken shit behavior (whether he really raped you or not). Waiting until somebody falls asleep to show them you mean business is not showing an asshole you mean business.
The girl tried to castrate souls in order to keep from feeling weak, and it still didn't work in the end.
by Solid Mantis September 26, 2019
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Castratee

Person who has or is having their balls chopped off. Can be used as a past tense or present but not for the future. Usually these men are gay or mormon.
Doctor- "YOU ARE NOW A CASTRATEE..."
Man- "YOU MEAN IM GAY?"
Doctor- "YES."
by Hairymonsterwomanwithaface January 2, 2010
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masterbateable

A word that can be used to replace debatable. It's better to use however when talking about the attractiveness of somebody.
Guy 1: Dude Jessica Alba is the hottest girl ever.
Guy 2: That's masterbateable.
by zerordie323 January 23, 2011
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Masterbater

One, who feels the need to touch and feel upon himself/herself, in order to get sexual pleasure.
See: masterbate
The kid across the street is a damn masterbater, did you ever smell his hands?
by OneHungryHungryHippo May 4, 2004
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Crasterbation

Crasterbation is when you masturbate too much and then you have to decide about coming later as you've been spanking the monkey too frequently.
I was crasterbating this morning and had no problem getting a woody but since I crasterbate everyday of the year I understand why I wasn't able to cum. To crasterbation is to pull the pud.
by Professor PMS December 26, 2014
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Crysterbate

Verb: To Crysterbate

Cry-sterbating is when a guy stands in a corner, crying using his own tears as lube while he jerks off sobbing, nuts into a teaspoon, drinks the nut because he's low on zinc, and then sits in the fetal position rocking back and forth wondering "When the hell did my life get so depressing?" Then he remembers and does it all again. Just like shampoo directions, rinse, wash, and repeat.

Billy: Wheres Dillon?

Josh: He's probably at home cry-sterbating again
Dillon tends to crysterbate instead of masturbating because his life is so fucked up. Plus he's low on zinc.
by Trip Wilson May 30, 2017
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