A self caused cockblock, with so much blocking power, it can only be caused by a major act of stupidity; Brought upon by themselves with good intentions for the receiver, but ended up bitting them in the ass. SPTC for short.
Guy 1: "Ha! That creeper just asked the hottest girl at university for nude photos via text!"
Guy 2: "He's got major Self Propelled Torpedo Cockblock now; He's never getting laid."
Guy 2: "He's got major Self Propelled Torpedo Cockblock now; He's never getting laid."
by c.NEWBY;m.MANYARD;m.CAMERON May 28, 2010
Get the Self Propelled Torpedo Cockblock mug.Mike: Yo neeg, let's peep Mr. Merryweather's house on the top of that hill and giv'r a nice torchjob, you hear?
Johnny: Fair game man, faiiiir game. I'll keep an eye for the heat, you deal the damage and we'll split like Hilton's legs.
Mike: Toight.
Johnny: Fair game man, faiiiir game. I'll keep an eye for the heat, you deal the damage and we'll split like Hilton's legs.
Mike: Toight.
by kroonk April 6, 2006
Get the torchjob mug.Jim: The stupid dog I was pet sitting swallowed a sock.
Steve: Really? What happened?
Jim: I took him to the vet and just before they were going to operate he shit the sock out at super speed.
Steve: Like a fecal torpedo?
Jim: Exactly.
Rob: How was lunch at the Chinese/Indian buffet place?
Lou: It was ok but half an hour later I had a fecal torpedo in stall #2
Steve: Really? What happened?
Jim: I took him to the vet and just before they were going to operate he shit the sock out at super speed.
Steve: Like a fecal torpedo?
Jim: Exactly.
Rob: How was lunch at the Chinese/Indian buffet place?
Lou: It was ok but half an hour later I had a fecal torpedo in stall #2
by Lou_III January 30, 2009
Get the fecal torpedo mug.The act of taking a shit in any body of water and guiding your fresh turd (henceforth referred to as the torpedo) to your friends swimming nearby, be it by natural currents or human motion. You position yourself upstream, take a squatting position and spread your butt cheeks to launch the warhead. As the guidance system locks in on your target, you then start the countdown sequence: “3, 2, 1, fire!” If your brown torpedo hits one of your friends and triggers its toxic cargo, you then shout “I’ve sunk your battleship!”
by Three Stripes June 10, 2014
Get the Dutch Torpedo mug.by McFatty May 6, 2005
Get the Shining the Torpedo mug.Kiersten bent over the sink so Chad could Torpedo her pussy and anus then he gave her a massive creampie and cum facial!
by SlopNChop November 27, 2016
Get the Torpedo mug.The act of turning a woman upside down, torching her pubes, and then fucking her with an ice-dildo in order to put out the flames.
This act takes some preperation. The woman must let her pubic hair grow to a considerable length. The act is as follows: The man turns the woman on her head, propping her feet against the wall. He then lights her pubic hair on fire. To set the fire out, he must fuck her with an ice dildo. The melting of the ice, with the water then flowing down her will subsequently quench the flames (due to her being upside down). AKA The Sherlock Holmes, only when the fire is started outside using sunlight and a magnifying glass.
This act takes some preperation. The woman must let her pubic hair grow to a considerable length. The act is as follows: The man turns the woman on her head, propping her feet against the wall. He then lights her pubic hair on fire. To set the fire out, he must fuck her with an ice dildo. The melting of the ice, with the water then flowing down her will subsequently quench the flames (due to her being upside down). AKA The Sherlock Holmes, only when the fire is started outside using sunlight and a magnifying glass.
Jane, John's girlfriend, surprised him on his birthday with a delicious Duck dinner. At the end of the meal, she dropped her pants and fulfilled his greatest fantasy by presenting him with her over-grown pubic hair and quickly demanding that he use the candle from the dinner to perform upon her the Honduran Torch.
by Mason W. May 11, 2006
Get the The Honduran Torch mug.