Constipation Masturbation

To masturbate wile constipated, or to masturbate on the toilet wile taking a great big ass poop :-)!

The guy was performing Constipation Masturbation to himself wile he was pooping :-P

by Andrew...aka...[CnW]Kill$hot September 30, 2007

Passport constipation

When you have applied for a passport with the US Government 6 months ago and you are leaving tomorrow and still can't squeeze out a passport for your spring break trip!

Hey Tracy: Have you received your passport yet for our trip to Punta Cana on Friday?

Tracy: Hell no, the US governemnet has passport constipation! They can't seem to squeeze out the passport I applied for 6 months ago!-

by MaxtheCameraMan April 4, 2009

alcoholic constipation

The inability to pass a pub or bar.

Man, that was a great night last night! All seven of us suffered alcoholic constipation. We must have hit every bar in town!

by TheNotBob December 6, 2009

metaphorically constipated

The mental state of not giving a shit.

Boy: you look like shit today

Girl: I'm metaphorically constipated

by Bigtittycommittee69 January 26, 2014

Creative Constipation

When one has an idea, a "hmmm" moment, but one can't just get the idea out of the brain into the physical world. From the brain to the world.

See: Creative Block.

I think I am slowly solving my own Creative Constipation.

by PlanesAreNotReal August 1, 2023

Constipation Stroke

When you try to shit but can’t so you make the effort worthwhile by giving yourself a good old fashioned wank and rubbing one out before flushing and hoping the turd will pass next attempt. If not, repeat.

I’m on my third constipation stroke today. If I don’t blow the other way soon I may have to resort to an enema.

Sometimes I think he eats a poor diet just for the ability to constipation stroke.

by Dick Onchin January 11, 2022

Constipation Contraction

A contipation contraction is when your anus / gluteus maximus muscles contract strongly causing a sharp and very uncomfortable pain, usually the same pain experiencenced whilst experiencing constipation. The contractions aren't always indicating constipation but there's a good chance it may follow.

Ben: *lift ass off chair and screechs in pain*
Josh: what's wrong?
Ben: Just had a constipation contraction -- ouch.
Josh: haha. eat too much cheese?

by okaythen873 July 31, 2009