Goosebumps that occur out of empathetic embarrassment.
When one
person witnesses another
person commit an act of such severe social discord the first
person will become embarrassed on behalf of the offending
person. When the embarrassment manifests itself as goosebumps, this is known as tard bumps.
The surface area of the body covered in tard bumps determines the severity of the case, measured by three specific states: 1.)Tard bumps on some area of the body, usually the arms or back of the neck.
2.) Full Body Tard Bumps wherein the entire body is covered in tard bumps.
3.) Tard Bump Seizure, wherein the case is so severe that the body actually convulses and one must remove themselves from the offending site, drink heavily or at the very least, close one's eyes.
Tard bumps frequently occur during amateur sporting events, courting scenarios, any time a
person uses a british accent, anything involving stage actors, any scenario in which high-fiving is the most frequent cooperative gesture and any scenario in which one
person attempts to fit in through misguided and energetic means.
P1. (Singing loudly while high-fiving and making eye contact) You got mud on yo'
face, big disgrace, kicking yo can all over the place!
P2. (To P3.) Let's get out of here, this dude is giving me serious tard bumps
P1. (Still singing) We
will, we
will, ROCK YOU!
P3. Yeah, if he does another air guitar solo I'm going to have a fucking tard bump seizure.
