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aural masturbation

When someone loves hearing the sound of their own voice, and that person's idea of a conversation is actually a soliloquy or monologue...and simply won't STFU.
Steve appeared to be blissful and aloof, oblivious to the bored and vexed faces of his companions, as he listened to the wall of sound exiting his mouth in yet another round of aural masturbation.
by MoGyver April 8, 2016
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masturbation Olympics

A +18 thing that is in the Olympics where 1. You masturbate until you reach ejaculation or 2. You stop masturbating right before you produce semen
Herby Hancock was desperate to watch the masturbation Olympics

Masturbation Olympics winner: the feeling of winning and ejaculation was so good that infact it is the best day of my life and also my advice is at least don't masturbate for 1 day before you do the masturbation Olympics
by Sebastian hiney February 27, 2021
mugGet the masturbation Olympicsmug.
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<.0.6.7.6.>Psychosomatically Masturbating PsychosocomaticallyarisesisasAresesisaPsychomaticau <.0.6.7.6.0.>
mugGet the <.0.6.7.6.>Psychosomatically Masturbating PsychosocomaticallyarisesisasAresesisaPsychomaticau <.0.6.7.6.0.>mug.

tactical masturbation

It's a term for masturbating (or busting a nut) before meeting a girl or going on a date. Now.. how is it useful? Well it helps you to think with your brain and not with your dick.
My friend: Bro.... I made a mistake. I accidentally did the deeds with Lily...

Me: God damn Lily???? Bro you really should have tactical masturbation
by Harsit2006 December 29, 2023
mugGet the tactical masturbationmug.

Ethical masturbation

Ethical masturbation does NOT refer to a literal act of masturbation performed ethically, rather, it refers to an act of self loathing and self deprecation done with the goal to ease one's mind, it is often done as follows (conversation example):

Ethical masturbator: oh no, big bad me did a big bad thing
a normal person: maybe do something about it, then?
Ethical masturbator: no, I will just sit here and talk myself down so that I feel like I have been true to myself and so I won't feel guilty about something-bad-that-I-did/something-bad-that-just-happened-on-it's-own even despite the fact that I did nothing to fix it.

another form of Ethical masturbation is doing the same exact thing but rather than just indulging in self-loathing, one might also start asking supernatural entities (gods, spirits, ETC) for forgiveness
just saying that you are bad won't fix things, it's not remorse - it's Ethical masturbation
by Leo of the Харків December 28, 2024
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masturbation

finely just had masturbation session
by finster May 16, 2022
mugGet the masturbationmug.

must masturbate may

something that does not exist like your dad
Joe "When is must masturbate may?"
Jeff "When your dad comes back."
Joe cries
by IDK BUT YOUR MUM IS GAY November 21, 2022
mugGet the must masturbate maymug.

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