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Computer

The best invention man ever created.
by TheSlangKid February 27, 2015
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Computer

An item of mystical power to which no human comprehends. Nothing will ever overpower the mystic god of modern life! It rules modern life just as much as a box of cookies rules a fat-asses life.
Holy shit, I just got a new Computer!
by CSF219 July 25, 2015
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computerware

All hardware and software components of a computer system.
The StrawRaspBananaBerry pie mini computer is a fully open source device as all computerware is under a GPL 2.0 license.
by zamicol January 6, 2016
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computer

A device that had different purposes over the years:
'80-90s- a device that allowed children to understand how to code and gave them insight on how things worked, this enriched them and now they are very good adults
2000s- a device that enriches BY FAR 1% of children/ teenagers and horribly degrades the other 99%
The 1% group is the group that has used computers to find out new and interesting information, the group that will defend net neutrality in the future, the group that knows at least basic coding and understands how they are vulnerable online. The 99% group includes people who sit on social media 24/7 and those who will keep reloading the page to comment on Miley Cyrus's comment. Another portion is those who play flash games on their school issued celeron based 1.4 ghz chromebooks, and treat them like magic. These groups usually don't know what a byte is. Another group is those who always say

Dumb guy- are you reading Wikipedia?
Decent guy- yeah it is interesting
Dumb guy- OMG you are so stupid Wikipedia is the most inaccurate website on the internet, those popups on websites are so much more accurate{goes on facebook to post that X guy is reading Wikipedia}
The 99% group usually are those who respond by "GO AWAIYYY" when you tell them to DEFEND NET NEURTALITY. They respond with OMG xxx singer just broke up omg as they look at their 10th iPhone which is an iPhone 7 bought on September 8th. Spread this degradation awareness so the 1% can become 20%.
I'm on my computer
Are you 1%
OMG MYLEY CYRUS BROKE UP
Nope u are the 99%
I don't care go away
by 322997am October 3, 2016
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computer

A person or thing which is really smart and does everything for you. It is usually blue so there is a chance smurfs are computers.
Look at that computer, he is so smart!
by pseudonymousme January 31, 2017
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Computophile

A computophile is someone who treats thier computer with all the latest updates, upgrades, tweaks, mods, ect. In addition to getting excited at the idea of inserting thier hard drive/flash drive into said computer's ports/anywere else it will fit repeatedly after removing the bra/panties from it....

Signs you could be one include excessive shopping due to excess fluids always ruining your computer parts, sexual innuendo about electronics, constantly touching it, and trips to the hospital to treat electrical burns on your junk.
Computophile:So I bought myself a new system, I just get so hard everytime I see it.
Thier computer : baby I'm so wet
Thier friend: wtf man its waterproof?

Computophile: yeah I got tired of electrical burns on my flash drive when sticking it into its sexy ports.... Its.... So.... Beautiful

His friend: what the fuck, get help man.
by F8less February 24, 2017
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Compuslut

Someone who uses any and all computers with little or no protection.

A person who feels a constant need to touch strangers' hard drives.
Zach is such a dirty compuslut. He never cleans his hard drive.
by Mybolognahasafirstname March 27, 2017
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