Hym "Holy shit you ACTUALLY did it! You gave the church credit for stopping rape. Go watch it. Everybody was raping and pillaging. Then the agricultural revolution happened and the people who hoarded resources started out-reproducing everyone. Then the church came along marriage saved everyone from rape... Except nobody told Christopher Columbus because I'm pretty sure his guys were raping and pillaging. There's some skepticism around it regarding his diary claiming that in his diary he told them not to rape. I know you're going to say here 'Columbus didn't work for the church!' And he didn't fucking have to you idiot. If the 'central guiding ethos' is the cause of everything that happens in a culture then it's the central guiding ethos. And as far as the bible is concerned, rape is rewarded. If you rape someone, according to the bible, you have to take the person as your wife. So, it's like pissing on a tree. There are MEN who ALMOST get raped in the bible. And the guy is like 'No, please, take my prostitute and daughter instead.' And take the daughter and prostitute they did. They didn't like the prostitute. They chopped her up pretty good. But it actively takes credit for every moral advancement humans make in real time. It didn't do that. It just unified the whites under one banner and the it came for eberyone else. Still, it's closer to MY theory of historical inter-sexual relationships than the red-pill dorks so... CORRECT AGAIN! The correctest man strikes again!"
by Hym Iam November 13, 2023
Get the The Churchmug. Freind: Give me £5 so i can go and get myself a drink
Me: Thats gonna work on me as much as a church fundraiser
Me: Thats gonna work on me as much as a church fundraiser
by MarioMama September 5, 2016
Get the church fundraisermug. by Jeckyb November 2, 2025
Get the Church flapsmug. Church-Bell is a Victorian slang phrase originally used to reference talkative women. Though slightly sexist at the time, the term usually now covers all genders.
“Your wife is a real church-bell when it comes to badminton.”
“So what? You're a real church-bell when it comes to knock-off pizzas and pirated movies, but you don't see me complaining.”
“So what? You're a real church-bell when it comes to knock-off pizzas and pirated movies, but you don't see me complaining.”
by C L G January 31, 2021
Get the Church-Bellmug. 1) When Jake Paul needs something to ryme with "merch" and invents a stupid word to put in his stupid song
2) "it's a church with a god in it" Pewdiepie 2k17
2) "it's a church with a god in it" Pewdiepie 2k17
by Parvencita July 7, 2017
Get the God Churchmug. by kurapikakafka May 6, 2021
Get the to leave churchmug. Someone who is possession of a Fila fanny pack. He often falls asleep in church. He is seen as a librarian hoe, a toe sucker, and a bitch.
by Churchalisous March 27, 2019
Get the Church Penismug.