Spatch

To spank one's snatch (or "cooter").

"Dude, I just spatched your mom last night."
"Dude, that's not cool, my mom's a nice lady."

by Juggy Brodleteen November 18, 2011

Splitch

What hot grease does when it pops out of a frying pan.

Ouch! I just got splitched by that bacon grease.

Put a lid on that, it's splitching everywhere.

Turn the heat down, it's about to splitch.

by 4ester2 May 27, 2011

Spatchcocking

When a wife covers her own ass by claiming her husband's incompetence or unwillingness resulted in failure or error when the actual root cause was her own inability or unwillingness to communicate clearly or effectively.

"My wife blamed the Thanksgiving turkey on my bad back."
"Dude, that's spatchcocking. You got spatchcocked."

by Celestin March 2, 2016

SPATCH-COCK

A serail drunark who continuously gets smashed, hits on women well above his league, tries anxiously to phone his on/off girlfriend and repeatedly crashes out due to exuberant use of a glass of beer. Welcome to the world of the spatch-cock.

1 beer: Marc says "hows life guys?"
2 beers: Marc says "fuck off ya bawbag"
3 beers: Marc says "Your a chamsie shatner"
4 beers: Marc says " They all want it, every last one of them!"
several beers later: After picking 3 fights with his own pals, Marc decides to wander aimlessly through the night club, hiccupping on his journey, trying to find the nicest girl to get slapped from. "Marc, you alright?"
"Im fine ya cunt"
"gie that burd peace, shes not interested!"
"they all want me, hiccup"
"Marc, were going hame, come on"
"aye wait up, I hate yous, I hate yous aw"
"Aye, very good Marc, ya spatch-cock"

by Rupert Shucks March 9, 2004

Spatchy

Portmanteu of speculative and sketchy, used when a source is unreliable or cannot be trusted.

Geek 1: Dude, did you see that Carol Danvers is going to be in the Guardians of the Galaxy movie?

Geek 2: Yeah, but that source was really spatchy.

by af632 August 17, 2012

slatch

V. as in " to slatch". Slatching occurs when it gets to the messy end of a night and options for sex become limited. That's when you decide to slatch someone. An amalgam of the words "latch" and "slut" it refers to the process of picking out the sluttiest looking girl in the bar/nightclub/parking lot and attaching yourself to her, ie you "latch onto a slut"

'See that chick over there with her boob half hanging out, I am so going to slatch her"

by Riverboat Crew September 21, 2012

spatchy

Online site for like minded people to gather. Chat-room for chating with fellow spatchers, and forums for sharing views and discussions, share music videos, and pictures. A difference is that unlike other forums where the members never met, spatchy organises activities for members to meet.

I'm going to spatchy to see what's happening over there.

by yugekib December 22, 2010