corpopreneur

an extremely incompetent, urgency-driven micromanager who uses cronyism and subterfuge to advance up the corporate ladder by taking credit he or she does not deserve. Takes up roles in strategic initiatives as a project manager to chase people, write reports and have low level analysts buried in spreadsheets to produce weekly decks and KPI reports.

- Who is the new director?
- Some non-entity. Used to work with our MD back in the day.
- Ah, shit.. So we got a corpopreneur....

by Buck Dancer May 23, 2020

Corporate Wordsmithing

The combination of ordinary words into complex phrases by corporate personnel to appear smarter than they are.

Corporate Wordsmithing: Our flawless execution will enhance the customer experience of our iconic brand allowing us to leverage synergies while building strategic partnerships thereby elevating employee engagement through deep dive analysis and constructive feedback.

by TylerGi April 13, 2016

corplighting

A portmanteau of Corpspeak and Gaslighting.

Corplighting evolved spontaneously from the need to manage questions -- via blame deflection, positioning, and trending jargon. Corplighting optimizes the message and controls and minimizes information flow. It also undermines and subtly invalidates the premise, managing workforce mindset.

Today's all-hands meeting was 80% corplighting about WFH policy changes.

by s1gz3r0 June 16, 2023

Corporate Culture

A prescribed method of turning everyone into an obedient drone with a plastic smile and fake enthusiasm for their daily dose of abuse from people who probably don't know shit about the actual mechanics of their operations

The corporate culture of this firm implicitly requires employees to work in an environment that allows criticism and policy changes to be made by a management that is far removed from the daily operations of the company. Any form of deviation or disagreement with policy is severely frowned upon.

by Master of the Cremaster April 11, 2014

Corporate simp

Unlike the corporate whore, the corporate simp is a person that works their hardest not for monetary gain but for the sole purpose of making (upper) management happy, with complete disregard for their colleagues. The modern way of expressing that someone is a brownnose, suck up, and kiss ass.

Person 1: Management increased our new quota just because (Name) keeps staying late and taking on extra tasks!
Person 2: Yeah, he's become such a corporate simp!

by Niki N July 9, 2020

corporate drone

A mindless robot for the corporation. Someone who has "sold out". Goes along with all management initiatives and enjoys repeating corporate "jokes" like "is it Friday yet", and "didn't you get the memo about the red shirt",

Aaron used to be cool. Ever since he sold out he's nothing but a corporate drone.

by Biff T July 25, 2007

corporatelalia

Obtuse, vague, and confusing verbiage crapped out in official documents by corporations and their lawyers. Meant to mislead and confuse, and to promote a prescribed company line. Also see corporatespeak, legalese, and marketing.

That memo e-mailed out by HR this morning was so full of corporatelalia, I don't know what the hell is going on at this office.

by giraffe-o May 23, 2007