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Bacon

Jesus Christ was born from the Virgin Mary. When he was a young boy, he was contacted by God and notified that he was the Son of God. In order to impress his father, he strived to have a book written about him. He was kind, generous, polite, and courteous to everyone he met, but this just wasn't good enough to inspire a biography. So one day, Jesus was baking bread to feed some local villagers who had no food. While Jesus was turned away from his oven, God zapped the bread, instantly turning it into enough bacon to feed Jesus' entire village. Until that day, bacon was a food that was only available in Heaven. However, mortals did not know of the existence of bacon, as many would have committed suicide in an attempt to get it. When Jesus took the bacon out of his oven, the smell instantly attracted anyone within a 10-mile radius. Jesus' house was almost instantly crowded with people, including, to his good fortune, some authors. The authors, immediately after tasting the bacon, said that they would write a whole book about him, and that one day he would be revered as the messiah of an entire religion. He didn't believe them at the time, but his skepticism was later adjourned. Everyone who tasted the bacon that was not an author became one of Jesus' followers, now known as Christians. Don't believe the farmer's lies....This is how bacon came to earth.
Hard Working Husband: What are you cooking woman?

Submissive Wife: Just some bacon Your Lordship

Hard Working Husband: JESUS CHRIST! BACON! THAT STUFF IS GODLY!!!
by Addiego April 26, 2010
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bacon-wrapped hot dog

The only truely proprietary food of Los Angeles, California. While these tasty little devils can be found in many major metropolitan areas - especially outside the doors of nightclubs and bars around last call - their immense popularity in Los Angeles (especially various Hollywood club and bar districts) and the fact that little deviation from the tried-and-true recipe of hot dog + bacon wrapped around it + topped with grilled onions/peppers is ever found, nay, tolerated in the streets of Los Angeles, makes them truly a Los Angeles culinary icon.

The Bacon wrapped hot dog has its roots further south of Los Angeles, namely, Tijuana, Mexico and Baja, California - however, before it emigrated north of the border the hot dogs had other - may i say - unnecessary (read: stupid) additions to it, i.e. cheese, salsa, olives, and occasionally a mexican "meat" called chorizo. these south of the border variations also go by the name "regio" dogs. do not buy or consume these. you will get AIDS and/or chlamydia...and they make you ugly.

Los Angeles bacon wrapped hot dogs however, are completely safe - though they may be made by unlicensed street vendors who are in violation of local health codes (and, by the way - officially banned by the city and county of Los Angeles), and are often fried on top of cookie sheets affixed to a burner fueled by a portable propane tank in the open air, so all manner of airborne particles (dirt, smoke, dust, sneeze and cough particulates, rain, and even semen!) are free to land on them - didn't i mention that they are fried? and anyone who understands science understands that fire. kills. everything.

all in all, these LA treats are like an orgiastic explosion of greasy flavor that blocks up your arteries but not your throat. So, if you ever visit the best (and trashiest) city in America, hit up the Cahuenga Corridor over the weekend and pound one of these bad boys into your greedy little mouth - and you'll know why you came...you fucking tourist.
Pat, Alle, Rodrigo bail out the door of Bordner's/Moscow at 2:05AM:

Patrick: shit dude, iso fuckin drunk I wanna-
Rodrigo: I'm fuckin starving!!!
Allesandra: dude, it's one of those s***s selling those baconhotdogs!
Patrick: I'm so down! gimme five dollars
Rodrigo: *eating noises* (chewing on a bacon-wrapped hot dog)
by Patrick.Marshall June 27, 2008
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Related Words

bacon

by bennett January 20, 2003
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Eggs and Bacon

The process of putting your dick and balls between your legs. Closing both legs and bending over to show your friends the delicious breakfast you have made for them.
Next time someone bitches about not eating breakfast show them your eggs and bacon and they will think twice about it again.
by Chad Kramer October 5, 2006
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An adjective describing a hot and georgeous female!
Ricky:
Hey Jessie!

Jessie:
What Ricky?

Ricky:
Man I saw this bad as brazilian girl

at the mall yesterday!

Jessie:
Oh yeah she was looking that good?

Ricky:
Oh yeah she was looking like a bacon egg and cheese sandwich
by unkownalister November 9, 2013
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Filipino Bacon Wrap

The act of wrapping semi-cooked bacon around your penis and having a partner suck it off.
Garret: "Dude, Sara gave me a Filipino Bacon Wrap last night. It was so awesome."

Spencer: "Nice, what kind of bacon was it?"

Garret: "Canadian cock bacon."
by VoodooSoup December 18, 2010
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bacon sarnie

"That bloke who lives up the road is a bacon sarnie, iznee."

"Does it matter?"
by Alex Quantashassle August 28, 2005
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