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Beached Whale Status

The moment in which you now no longer resemble a human being but look more like a beached whale ready to take its eternal rest. protocal requires you to update you facebook status to read "beached whale status", but chances are your not gonna get it up there.

**You are now at the point of no return, you will not move for the rest of the night unless there is an emergency**
idiot: yo hand me my phone

You: dude i cant im beached whale status right now
by Mr.DirkAsFuck March 5, 2011
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my relationship status

by I'm_Gay February 21, 2017
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Z status

Extremely extravagent and in depth, difficult to work on, over the top, designed in such a manner as to create a feeling of superiority through complication.
Person 1: man it took three hours to change one spark plug!
Person 2: wow sounds like it was Z status
Person 1: totally...
by Mike Highberger September 18, 2008
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status

The word used to describe how something is. It can be used positively or negatively.
1. Positive-"Yo that trick was sick status!"
2. Negative-"Thats just gay status."
3. Positive-"That ice cream was hella good status!"
4. Negative-"Dude your house is boring status!"
by sick_status_jman July 24, 2010
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statute

No federal statute indicates an American citizen living and working in one of the fifty states is liable for the federal income tax.
by Jon Davis January 14, 2004
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Stick Status

An extremely exclusive title given to golfer's that excel at their craft.
Yo man, you shot 68 at Alta on the weekend?! You got Stick Status breh!
by Steep Dogg April 20, 2011
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if statement

An if statement is a programming construct that executes logic based on application purpose. many people claim programming is difficult, but as can be seen by this very simple example, variables, functions and if statements all make sense once applied to a layman's terms use.

DECLARE person_you_hate = <insert name of hated person>
DECLARE disability = <insert name of disability>

if ($person_you_hate = $disability) then
do send-to-gas-chamber
else
do commit-suicide
end if

function send-to-gas-chamber{
do grab $person_you_hate
then shove $person_you_hate
then close door
then turn knob
watch gas kill $person_you_hate
return happy()}

function commit-suicide{
do grab $person_you_hate
then humiliate $person_you_hate
then hand $person_you_hate noose
then force $person_you_hate onto wonky table
watch $person_you_hate die
return happy()}
Im going to use an if statement to settle this dispute
Dammit man, im an if statement, not a Star Trek character
If statement = stupid then

do kill-yourself-for-reading-this
else

do shoot-a-small-furry-animal-for-fun
end if
by honneamise December 4, 2018
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