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Purple Kiwis

They are the most sinister birds. You know loose threads on you favorite t shirt? Purple kiwis. You know all the random and probably unnessesary dials in micrwaves, dishwashers, washing machines, ovens, and other assorted appliances? Purple kiwis. You know when plastic bottles seem really hard to open because your hand keeps slipping? Purple kiwis grease them up. You know when the toilet seat is unreasonably cold? Purple kiwis. You know when the tiolet seat is unnervingly warm? Purple kiwis. You know when the drawstrings to your sweatshirt get pulled too much on one end and it gets stuck inside the hood? Purple kiwis. You know those little plastic thingies that are used to attach tags to shirts that you should probably cut with scissors but your too lazy and when you try to pull it you just rip the tag off and the plastic thingy is still there and even though you could get scissors you decide to keep trying to pull it off but you cant because its too small and when you give up and just wear it, it is really itchy and you finally go and get scissors but you cant find any? Purple kiwis. You know autocorrect? You know that feeling when you have an itch but you cant find the exact place and you end up looking like a leper with all of your scratching? Purple kiwis. You know when bags of chips have a total of two and a half chips in them? Purpe kiwis. They may look cute when you see them, watch out. They are malicious creatures who crave suffering. They hail from Old Zealand.
Purple kiwis ate my sandwich but left all the crust.
by Bobthelobster March 6, 2022
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banging out a purse

The plumber just finished blow torching my sink, now I'm going to spend a few hours banging out a purse.
by furiousBall June 2, 2009
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coin purse

Bill slaps his coin purse on people
by Jizrod December 15, 2002
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purple kush

A type of Marajuana

Very High Quality
Purple Kush--It's some bomb-ass weed, nuff said.
by colinbballin April 22, 2006
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Kettle Purse

A Kettle-Purse is the KettleBell used in Crossfit.

Crossfit is a type of exercise system like p90x or zumba dance, but Crossfit has become the laughing-stock of the entire internet, in large part because they often follow a now debunked Paleo Diet. (Put "CROSSFIT FAIL" in Google to See this embarassing fitness group.)

Cross-Fit uses a variety of poor 'fitness' techniques that range from the useless to the dangerous to silly, effeminate, and totally ridiculous. One type of exercise in Crossfit involves swinging an iron weight which is shaped like a 'hanging ball' with a loop handle on it. Crossfitters call this a kettlebell from the russian, but now the whole rest of the fitness world is calling this thing a KETTLE-PURSE because it looks like crossfit guys are carrying a tiny feminine woman's Purse.

Crossfit has now made it look like men are exercising while holding a little ladies purse. " KETTLEPURSE "
- "Oh, god, not another Crossfit class." -- "How can you tell it's Crossfit?" - "Because all the guys are carrying their KettlePurses, and also because of the paleo diet body odor."

- Grok signed up for Crossfit, he thought he was exercising like a caveman, but little did he know, to the public he looked like an unfit guy swinging a little woman's kettle purse. And his paleolithic grok logo looks like a caveman who is wearing a Skirt."

- "Instead of using a barbell, crossfit men use a little weight called a KettlePurse, making them look more like a Dumbbell."

- "The KettlePurse ... like it's already-debunked paleo diet, yet another Crossfit Fitness Failure."

- Nobody builds muscle from Planking, much less butterfly pullups, or swinging around a girly kettle-purse, making Crossfit now the embarassment of the exercise world.
by Review Committee October 23, 2012
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purps

purple nugs, useually really dank and smooth hitting
"yo, roll up some of those purps and lets all get blunted."
by Dank Master Flex April 7, 2003
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Purple Guy

1.A misunderstood poor soul who deserves another chance.

2.A friend who is creepy and shows signs of being purple guy
Purple guy is from fnaf
That person really seems like Purple guy
by Fuzzalishiess October 17, 2018
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